Ep #43: Belief Capacity

Welcome to More Than Mindset, the only podcast that bridges the gap between spirituality and success. Go beyond the mind with Clarity and Confidence Coach Kim Guillory, and learn how to integrate your passion to serve with your skills and experience to create a business you love. Let’s get started.

Hello, lovelies, and welcome back. Just so you know, I am still in this ease, flow, and very graceful essence. I’m kind of wiggling my way through life right now. I’ve had some really major events happen, which I will not go through on the show, because it would just take too long. It would take up, like, all of the episodes.

But, I am really holding on to new beliefs, new neural pathways, new programming that is anti-programming. And if you’ve heard the last few episodes, then I’ve kind of talked about this, but today, I want to reel it in a little bit closer and use it in a way that will be tangible to you.

And I want to talk about your belief capacity, because that is what all of these current incidences have shown me. And, you know, I like to learn and then share. So it’s basically take it in, integrate it, embody it, and then share it with others. That’s just what I do.

So, we already know that your thoughts create your reality, okay? You’ve heard that a million times. And it used to piss me off, because I’m like, yeah, yeah, yeah. I’ve been, why is this happening? Or if I’m thinking this, then why is this happening? And I get it. I hear it all the time, but it didn’t make sense. And I remember stopping my bike, talking to Louise Hay, asked if she could hear me saying positive affirmation is not enough.

Because there is a route. There is an emotional signature buried deep within the body, that we keep getting triggered by, that overrides the thought. Okay, so that is my argument. That’s what I mean about More Than Mindset. And my role, the thing that I do, or where my zone of genius is, is to help people identify that, dismantle it, unveil it, uncover it, pull it out, plant a new system, a new way to be, a new belief.

And your belief capacity is how long are you able to hold on to the new thought, to the new belief, before you actually go back to the old way? Okay, let me stop here for a second and give you a moment to think about this. I’m going to describe it; I’m going to take it down. Thought creates a feeling in your body. You think a certain thing, and then you feel a certain way.

When you feel that way, it compels you to take an action, either to act or to react. Triggers will cause a reaction. Feeling compelled will cause an action, depending on your thought. And whatever action you take determines the results that you have in your life today, This, big T, this is the big Truth. All right.

The thing is, we weren’t really taught how to turn it around. We’re just taught that that’s just what truth is. That’s just how it works. That’s like the laws of the universe is, think it and to become it. And I want to talk more about going beyond the mind to understand that the unconscious thought counts. I think this is not being taught, in most cases.

In other words, we’re being taught all about mindset, change your thought, change your thought, if you don’t think that way, then you won’t have that result. You’ve just got to keep changing your thought and changing your thought, and you just walk around bypassing, mentally bypassing. In other words, coming up with a better thought, and not really believing it.

So of course your belief capacity is not going to be very long, because you don’t truly believe it on all levels. Just because you logically believe it, just because you’re saying it with your mind, does not mean you truly believe it. Okay?

More on that. This is what was so hard for me to break through, because I’ve got a brilliant brain and it fires really fast. I’ve got like this brain on fire, and I love to figure things out, and I love to have breakthroughs, and I love like new awareness and awakening and, like, just figuring stuff out. And this took me forever, it seemed, to figure out.

And I believe because there is a little hole in the theory. Kind of like the Flaw of Attraction, if you’re not feeling it, you’re not going to be able to create it, because you’re not going to be able to feel into the vibration, and it is the vibration that attracts it. If you’re not sure what I’m talking about, go back a few episodes back, I talked about the Flaw of Attraction, and listen to that one, and then you can follow up.

So, what’s happening is, we basically walk around here pretending like we feel a certain way when we really don’t, because the unconscious thought is creating the vibration below the surface, and that vibration that’s below the surface is what is compelling your action. And so, you could be saying, “I’m at my ideal body weight. It feels amazing. My body is awesome. It feels so good to be lean and thin.” But then, unconsciously, you’re just saying, “Yeah, right. Wouldn’t that be nice?”

That is actually what is causing the vibration for you to take the action, which is, not believing it so you’re not doing as if it is so. I feel like it’s, like I’m going in circles on this. So, we’re going to talk a little bit about your belief capacity.

So I want you to bring to mind the thing that you want to achieve the most. Is it getting a certain number of clients in your business? Making a certain dollar amount by the end of the year, or within 12 months? Or, is it maybe losing weight? So, you just think about it for yourself. I’m going to use business as the example, because that’s mostly who I’m speaking to here, is coaches and wellness advocates and leaders.

And most of you, the problem is getting your business off of the ground, and that is because your unconscious belief that you’re not good enough, you’re not worthy, what you have is not as valuable. Nobody believes you, or nobody wants it, or you can’t figure out how to get your message across, or whatever the lame excuse is that you’re using. Just know that it may be lame, but it’s got a lot of weight to it, so you’ve really got to dial in and figure out what it is.

And so if your unconscious thought is, getting this business off of the ground is hard, or, it takes time, it’s going to come when it comes, like all of those thoughts are creating this feeling in your body, which is not compelling you to take the actionable steps to get you the results for it to happen today. And that is because you believe it takes time and it’s hard and it’s going to take long and it’s supposed to be whatever it is that your mind is telling you.

And guys, if you have this unconscious story running, it’s going to be really hard for you to step into that belief and get into the sensation, the vibration of it, to where you’re actually taking the action that’s going to help you move forward.

Because the secret to business, to a successful business, is clarity and confidence. You’ve got to feel really clear about what you’re offering, what you believe, and then you have to feel really confident in being able to deliver that value to the world. So much value that they’re willing to pay for it consistently.

And that is what creates a tangible, viable business that is predictable in income, that you can repeat over and over, because let me tell you why. And this is all about your belief capacity. You may sign one client, and if your belief capacity is on the low end, you’re going to have this unconscious story that it was a fluke. It was a mistake. You lucked out. They just so happen to have caught you on a good day. Or, maybe it was a referral, and so they believe the person who was referring them, or it was like accidental, right?

This is really tricky. Because you’re walking around saying, convincing, of how much value you have to offer, but your belief capacity, and you truly being in the value and belief of that, is on the low scale. And that is the vibration that you’re putting out, and you have to understand the difference. So the longer you go in the belief capacity, the longer you carry the vibration in your body, the more familiar it gets, the longer you stay in it. And then as you spend that time in it, and you’re oozing the essence of belief, you actually begin to become it.

So what I mean by belief capacity, let me just give you an example, because I tend to understand better when someone gives me an example. So I had something recently happen, and I believed, I had this inner knowing in believing the best outcome. Like, I knew that I knew that I knew, even though it seemed impossible. Like, I just knew. Somewhere really deep down, rooted in the sacral or solar plexus, like really deep down.

I had this knowing so much so that I actually could tap into the energy of it when I would try to resist it, and go out and try to make something happen. I would hear this knowing of no, it’ll come to you. And I’m like, this does not make sense. But, I trusted the knowing that I knew, so much so that I would use a lot of the practices that I take you through on the podcast, I used that for myself.

I would stop, and I would breathe, and I would drop into the lower part of my belly. “I’m willing to believe.” I’m willing to believe this so much so that I don’t need to figure out how it’s going to flow. I just need to keep believing and allow it to come to me. It was almost like this little test of increasing my own belief capacity.

And this went on for a few hours, and when the entire incident was over, I told a friend. I said, “So, now I’ve come to realize that my belief capacity is about 48 hours.” Because after the second day of hearing the voice, of having this knowing, sensing this sensing that I just needed to wait, that it was going to come. It was almost like when you get up from the dinner table and you trust that you’re full, and then you’re not so sure. You kind of want seconds, and then you kind of like hear this voice, like “Sit down, you don’t need to go get that.”

It was like this kind of like, I kept wanting to get up to go do, and then I would hear, “No, you need to just stay.” And I would get up, “No, you need to just stay.” So I did this for 48 hours. And then I was like, giving in the next day. I was like, all right, well, this does not make sense. I have no tangible proof. I need to get off my butt and I need to go make shit happen. Right? Can all of you relate to what I’m saying?

I need to get up and go do it myself, because it’s not going to come. This is hogwash. This is not going to work. And I heard it very loud and clear. “It will come to you.” I sat back down. I can tell you the exact time, I looked at my clock. I sat back down and I stayed with the sensation in my body, which was really shaky. It was like really wobbly.

I could feel this wobbly energy inside of my body and it was resistance. It was me not wanting to stay in the belief, because my mind wanted me to go and do something. And guys, this is what your mind will do. I was playing the game with the universe, with divine consciousness, with this inner understanding, and I was willing to be surprised.

And I want you to invite that surprise element into your life. I was willing to be surprised that it could come in a way greater than my mind could imagine. Because I had not experienced anything like this before, my brain had no resources to pull from, to imagine how it would happen.

And this is where a lot of you throw in the towel. And instead of sitting and staying with the belief and growing it, because that’s what was happening. I was resisting believing longer, but because I was tuned in to this consciousness, I was tuned in to this awareness, and I was willing to be with the resistance, and to feel it in my body, to allow it to be there, to allow it to teach me and to grow my belief. It just dropped down in the lower part of my belly, boof, and I felt this calm sensation come over me.

And it only lasted a few seconds, and then my mind came back into the game. You better get up and do something. This is not just going to happen. You’ve got to do it. You’ve got to be responsible. You need to do the thing, right? And this is what happens with all of us. This is that, when we start white knuckling and willpowering and making things happen.

Instead of trusting that one program offer, or that one thing that we do, we go out and try offering a whole bunch of other things at a cheaper price, because we’re not willing to sit and grow the belief capacity.

I want you to think back in your business how many times you have done this. You make a decision. I’m going to offer this three-month program or this six-month program or this particular retreat or whatever it is, and then you don’t get the response right away and you drop the belief. And then your mind goes to work thinking, what else could it do? I should offer a deal, I should offer a package, I should offer people to come for free, so that they can see that other people are coming. What are your “I should”?

I want you to take the time to write it down. So, don’t just listen, actually participate and do the work so that you get the transformation. So I want you to, if you’re in your car, of course you can’t write it down. You can actually put this on pause though, or go back and listen to this part.

Ask yourself, “What do I do when no one answers the offer? Do I stop? Do I change it? Do I cut the price in half?” What is it, outside of yourself, that’s preventing it from coming? What are you telling yourself? Write all of this stuff down? Why is it not happening? You make the offer one time or two times, and then you have a belief of why you didn’t get the response you thought you would get.

And instead of doing your work, and uncovering these thoughts so that you can understand why you keep creating the same results, you give in to the old neural pathway. You give in to the old program, and you believe it’s because of your offer, instead of because of your belief and your energy. I see this all the time.

Are you willing to stay in the discomfort long enough to allow the belief to grow, so that your capacity to believe can grow? What is your belief capacity? I’m telling you in this particular case, which it was a really big deal, I had to make a decision, because I had a lot of urgent things following it, and mine was 48 hours, in this particular case. Are you willing to start measuring?

Think about this. When was the last time you put out an offer, that you put a post, and how long did you wait before you gave in? Ten minutes after you put the post? After you put it for the tenth time? After you put it the second time? After you had the third inquiry? Like, really go and look at the last time you did it, or start here and put out the offer and see how long you stayed in belief, before you threw in the towel, before you change the action.

You guys love to change the circumstance and the action. I call these my A-liners. They always want to know what to do differently, what to do next, instead of just, go and investigate your thoughts that are creating the feeling of doubt and defeat, that’s compelling you to take a different action. Right there is the secret.

Guys, you do not need to go do a year-long package program thingy in order to figure this out. You need to get this part right here. You have to investigate what you are doing now. No one has the answer for you, because they don’t know what it is that you’re doing. You know what it is that you’re doing, but you’re not willing to look at it, in order to autocorrect or self-correct.

All right, so I’m going to, like, really stay on you guys about this one. I’m going to bring it back and back and back and back and back until you get it, because the capacity to believe is what makes the difference. Are you willing to do the work to increase that capacity? Can you get it up to two hours? To two days? To two weeks?

Look at what you’re doing now, first. You have to get present and recognize the way you’ve been doing it, before you figure out another way to do it. And I know this is counterintuitive, and this is not what your brain is telling you. Your brain is telling you that someone else knows better and someone else has figured it out, and that you should just ask them.

But I am telling you, that is not true, that you know exactly what you need to do. But the first thing is you have to become present to see what you’re doing first. You want to get some private coaching, you want to get someone to work with you specifically and understand, that’s one thing, but don’t just go hang out on Facebook and Instagram and try to figure out what everyone else is doing, without looking at your own work.

You have to look into this. It’s not about somebody else doing it better, or someone knowing a perfect way. It’s about unveiling the way you are doing it, so that you can navigate and do it differently. But it’s not just about the action. You have to come into the feeling sensation. Okay?

So first thing is to get present. What am I doing? What do I want? What does that look like to me now? Get present, write it all down, put it on paper. Don’t just think it in your head. Your head is crazy. Write it on paper. What am I doing now? What do I want?

And then I want you to get to work. I want you to unveil the story. Why am I not getting it? What am I believing? What am I feeling in my body? What is compelling me to take actions that are giving me results that I don’t want? Unveil to understand.

If you continue, even though you do all this work and you continue and you come back and you’re stuck right here, get some coaching. A lot of this stuff, especially unconscious, we cannot see ourselves. And so what you’ll do is you’ll take the same thought and you’ll keep spinning it around as if it’s a circumstance, you know, think it’s a fact, and you won’t ever get to the bottom of it. And that’s because we can’t see our own stuff. We can’t see our own BS. It’s so familiar to us, that we just keep regurgitating it and we think we’re doing our work.

I see this all the time. You know, like, “I did my own coaching, I dealt with this.” And then whenever I have the conversation with them and I dial it down, for sure. They believed that the thought they were thinking was an actual fact when it wasn’t.

All right, so write all of that down. What are you thinking? Is it true? Question everything. And then you want to navigate, how can I do it differently? And that’s going to be the steps to stay in the belief. Like, when did I quit believing it was possible? And your thought may look like, no one answered the post, my copy isn’t clear, I did consultations and they didn’t buy, whatever your excuse is, it’s got to be that you’re doing it over and over and over and over and over and over, and you’re believing it to be true, when it’s actually not. And then you want to navigate around that.

So, the capacity to believe is something that you can strengthen. It’s something that you can practice staying with longer by being willing to experience the negative sensation and emotion in your body, and believe that it can happen for you, that it is possible. That this is my process, and this is how I learn, and what I have offers value and service to the world. And I’m willing to feel uncomfortable in order to grow my belief, so that I can take the aligned action to give me the results that I want.

And this could be, if you’re looking to make $30,000 or lose 30 pounds or, it doesn’t just relate to business. I know I’m using businesses an example, because that’s what most of my followers are listening for. But this could be in your relationships. Like, I really want to feel loved, or I really want this relationship to be better, or I want more intimacy in my relationship. And then what is your capacity to believe?

And so it could look like, well, I wanted to go out to eat and he was really ugly and sarcastic, and so I just quit, I threw in the towel, instead of being willing to feel the discomfort when your partner didn’t want exactly what you wanted. Unveil the story. What did you make it out to mean about yourself? Be willing to be uncomfortable. Dig up the root to that, “Oh, yeah, that’s my unworthiness. That’s me feeling rejected and neglected. That’s me. That’s all on me. Let me clean that up.”

And then you navigate by having a conversation, an intimate, honest conversation with your partner. That’s how you would do it in relationships. And it would be the same thing if it’s about weight loss. You want to uncover the conversation within yourself.

Guys, if you need help with this, come on over to the Integrative Life Facebook Community, say I listened to the podcast, I didn’t quite understand what you were talking about, could someone coach me on this? And we can coach you on the page. Otherwise, you can reach out and send an email to [email protected]. I would prefer you coming into the group, because then everyone else can learn from it.

Let me know if this was helpful. And please let me know, what is your belief capacity? Like, in this particular case, mine was 48 hours, but in the Integrative Life Community and what I’m creating here, my belief capacity, I’m at 10 years. Ten years. I have the vision, I can feel it, I just know it, I’m sure about it, I talk about it all the time.

I started this about 10 years ago. For sure, I ramped it up about six, seven years ago. I would say 2012-13, I can kind of follow my post on Facebook where I started really talking about building this health-conscious culture and community to support it.

And, that is my capacity to believe in this particular, what I’m teaching right now, what I’m teaching about on this today, what I’m doing in my life, in my own relationships with my money stories, like really breaking through the scarcity. Even my health, I had a lot of health conditions in the past.

And working through the way we perceive health, wealth, relationships, wellness in general, life, consciousness in general, like that awareness, spirituality. All of that, it’s like how we do anything is how we do everything, so it relates across the board.

I just like to focus on one thing whenever I’m giving an example, because the brain gets confused when you talk about a bunch of other stuff. But, how you do anything is how you do everything. So, if you just take one problem area of your life, and you dive in and you start doing the work, it’s going to show up in all the other areas.

All right, let me know, what is your belief capacity? How long do you wait, once you take an action? How long do you wait for the results that you want to show up? That’s the question. That is your belief capacity. And if you walk in the house, and you instantly look at your partner and say, “Oh, yeah, mm-hmm, that’s it.” Then your belief capacity is about two seconds. So really dive in and figure out what that is for you.

I love using business as the example, because that’s a tough one, you know, for most of us, because we believe that the reason we don’t have the business results or the success results that we want is because of an outside circumstance, because we don’t have the system, we don’t have the model, we don’t have the people, we don’t have the right warm market, blah, blah, blah. The email list, the website, whatever thing your brain thinks it is. That’s, you’re human, so am I. We all think the same thing.

Just know that, that is BS. That is your belief system. It’s about you getting in the energy and the essence and being the example of the work that you offer. In other words, you being your best client. You get the results that you are selling, and you become the example of that. You do it in a very clear, concise way. You show up in confidence, and you tap into the courage to stick with it. Commitment, girls. Commitment.

All right, until next week.

Thanks for listening to this episode of More Than Mindset. If you’re feeling stuck on your journey to health, wealth and relationships, head over to www.portal.kimguillory.com, to learn more about the portal. It’s a membership community where we take this work deeper, apply the concepts, and coach around the tough stuff.