Ep #260: Capacity to Tolerate: When Is Enough Enough?

In this episode of More Than Mindset, I’m exploring the concept of ‘capacity to tolerate,’ especially as it relates to working on your business.

We’ll start by reflecting back on the defining moment you decided to venture out on your own.

What You’ll Learn:

  • How to measure your commitment level to growing your business.
  • The hurdles that new business owners face.
  • How to take consistent action, even when faced with failure.
  • What ‘buffering’ is – the act of pretending to work while avoiding actual productive work and what qualifies.
  •  

This is the hard truth you need to hear to encourage you to quit making excuses, start taking productive action, and truly serve your potential customers!

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Full Episode Transcript:

Ep #260 Capacity to Tolerate: When Is Enough Enough?

Welcome to More Than Mindset. The only podcast that bridges the gap between spirituality and success. Go beyond the mind with clarity and confidence coach, Kim Guillory, and learn how to integrate your passion to serve with your skills and experience to create a business you love. Let’s get started.

[00:00:00] Hey there, and welcome back to the show. I have a really interesting topic for you today, and it is your capacity to tolerate. When is enough enough? I’ve been discussing this with my clients for weeks now, but this last week it has come up so many times that I gave it a title. So let’s dive in.

[00:01:02] I want you to think back to when you decided you wanted to be a business owner, when you decided you wanted to help people, that you wanted to make money without boundaries, when you wanted to be free. Free to express yourself and serve in a way that works for you that maybe it was, it was getting away from the nine to five, or maybe it was just tired of working dead end jobs.

[00:01:26] But at some point. You decided you had enough of something else and you were willing to go all in on yourself as a business owner. Is that you? Is that what you said? Do you remember why? What did you have enough of? When did your capacity to tolerate what was going on, when, when did you reach the peak of that?

[00:01:56] Like, I have peaked out my capacity, my tolerance level for being talked to that way or being treated that way. At what point did you make that decision? I’m going to open my own business. I’m going to. Build my own practice. I’m going to do this my way. I want to help people and I don’t want to be limited in the way that I do that.

[00:02:26] I want to bring my authority and my expertise to the market and I want to do things my own way. I’m creative. I’m brilliant. I’m talented, wise, and smart. I have figured out a lot of things, and I know people can use my help. At some point, you decided that. You made that decision. I’m going to be a business owner.

[00:02:56] I’m going to do it the way that it feels good for me, that is going to help others. So what happened that led to that decision? What did you have enough of? And what are you currently tolerating? So I know, with new business owners, we make a decision and we commit to it, but we don’t fully commit. We mentally commit.

[00:03:23] But let me ask you something. Did you emotionally commit? Did you feel it in your body viscerally? Did you imagine what it was going to be like when you got there? Did you imagine those clients that you were going to help? Did you imagine maybe even the employees that were going to come in and help you?

[00:03:44] Depends on how big your business is and what your decision was. Or did you just think it, you saw someone else doing it and you’re like, that looks easy. I can do that. How far did you get? If you go back and listen to previous episodes, I talk about the capacity to believe and your commitment level. So on a scale of one to four, where are you in the commitment?

[00:04:14] So you made the decision. But how committed are you to following through with that decision to become your own boss, to be a business owner, to make your own money, to set your own hours and what has gotten in the way. So on a scale of one to four, where are you today? And the way that we’ll know this.

[00:04:38] It’s by the results that you have gotten. How much money have you made? How many people have you helped? So write that down. This is step number one. Well, step number two. First one is on a scale of one to four. How committed are you? The next question is, what are the results that that commitment has gotten you?

[00:05:03] And so if you tell me I haven’t made any money yet, I haven’t helped anyone yet, then I’m going to ask you step number three. What have you done to get zero results? And can you take responsibility for what you have done? Because you’ve done something. You can’t say nothing. So if you have. Decided and committed and you’re taking the steps towards it and you don’t stop.

[00:05:33] You continue taking the steps towards it. Even when it’s hard, even when it feels bad, terrible, uncomfortable, you still take the steps. You go to bed feeling bad, you wake up feeling bad and you still take the steps. You use the energetic hygiene chart and you make yourself feel better and you go and you do it and you do it and you do it and you do it because you know it’s going to pay off.

[00:05:56] Because your belief and your commitment is so high, even though you don’t see the results yet. Or did you decide and commit and you started taking action and then when you realized how hard it was, you chose to get overwhelmed. You chose to be confused. You chose to spin in, I don’t know, and you started buffering with watching a whole bunch of people.

[00:06:29] Buffering means the thing that your mind does while you’re not doing anything and you call it something. It comes out like this. I’m working on, I’m thinking about, I’m figuring out. That is buffering. It’s when your mind makes up, makes up this story that you call action. But it’s not revenue-producing action.

[00:06:55] It’s not generating results. So which one of those are you? You committed and you’re doing it, even though it feels bad and you keep doing it and you don’t quit doing it, or you committed and you did one or two things. I hear a lot of you, well, I posted on Facebook, well, I put it up on Instagram. Well, I did a real, uh, I put up a website.

[00:07:21] I got an LLC, I’m working on my course, my digital course, sorry guys, that is not income producing action. I wish I could tell you different. If it’s bringing you zero results, you got to quit doing it. You got to get clear about who you’re helping and you have to go find out where they are and you have to start talking to them and showing them that you can help them.

[00:07:50] That’s what you have to go do right now. And that will convert more clients. Then this confusion and this overwhelm and this working on my business. I cannot even tell you how my capacity to tolerate anyone saying I’m working on my business. I’m over it. You’re not working on your business. If you’re not willing to fail, you’re not working on your business.

[00:08:22] If you’re not willing to sell, you’re not working on your business. If you’re not meeting people, if you’re not making offers. If you’re not showing up and giving value like I am right now, I’m working on my business right now in the way that I’m producing content that’s going to help someone. And they tell me all the time, thank you so much.

[00:08:47] The podcast has been so valuable. It keeps me in momentum. It motivates me. Thank you. I didn’t even know that before I heard you say it. So are you giving the public value? Are you writing something, saying something, getting in front of them, helping them for free if you have to, until you establish authority, until you become known in your niche.

[00:09:18] These are the things that you need to measure. Did you decide that you wanted to become a business person? And did you decide you’re going to do whatever it takes? Did you commit? To doing it even though it was uncomfortable. And are you still taking action? Not the same action. When something doesn’t work, you try something else.

[00:09:41] When that doesn’t work, you try something else. You keep doing things and trying things until something clicks. It will eventually click. What that is doing is it’s, it’s getting the disbelief out of you. You have to fail. You have to fall. You have to prove that you’re willing to do things to figure it out.

[00:10:01] There is no perfect process. What has worked for these other people may not work for you. What’s worked for me may not work for you. We’ve got to go in there and figure out what’ll work for you. It’s like telling you exactly what to eat or how to move or what to do at the gym. We don’t know your physiology.

[00:10:16] We don’t know your body. We don’t know. Like there’s so many components that need to be addressed, decide, commit, take action. I call this tattering, try, assess, tweak. And try again. So I’m putting out a podcast, I’m several years in and I’m still trying different things. What will pique your curiosity? What do you want to hear?

[00:10:46] I assess by how many downloads, how many shares, how many people are listening, how much feedback do I get? And then I decide, do I need to tweak it? And try again, or do I continue doing it because it’s working? I know it’s hard. It doesn’t feel tangible. It doesn’t feel like it’s going to stick or it’s going to work, but this is what you have to do until you get to 10, 20, 30, 000.

[00:11:14] So if you haven’t made any money yet, stop focusing on processes and digital courses and websites. Just stop. Hopefully. Your capacity to tolerate your own drama, your own BS, your mind’s distractions. Hopefully you have gotten to the point to where you are sick and tired of not helping people and not making money.

[00:11:47] Please tell me that your capacity to tolerate your own excuses has run out. Please, please tell me that. Post it below if you’re watching me live, respond to wherever you got this podcast and comment there. Let me know on social media. My capacity to tolerate my mind’s BS, the lies, the excuses, the justifying, the explaining, the rationalizing has reached the end.

[00:12:23] I am completely out. I can no longer tolerate my own excuses. Could you do that? Is that you? Please. Believe it or not, you have to get to that point. It’s the next decision you have to make. So the first decision you made is, I’m going to do this. The second decision you made is, I’m going to commit to doing this.

[00:12:48] The third is, I’m so committed that I’m going to take action. The fourth, I’m so committed I’m going to take action and I’m going to keep taking action until something works. You’re going to make the decision to quit listening to the excuses, to quit listening to the past. You don’t live in the past. Quit going there.

[00:13:08] Quit going back to what didn’t work when you were five. Quit going back to just quit. Just don’t go to the past at all. Just close the door, close the door and look forward and ask the person that you are today. Because you’re not the same person from the day you decided to go into the business. So ask the person you are today, what does my person need to hear?

[00:13:29] How did I feel when I was them? When I was in that position, what did I want to hear? What kind of help did I need? Get some clarity. What is their problem? And then how can you solve their problem and then get in front of them and show them, don’t tell them, show them you can help them. I did a webinar today.

[00:13:56] It was a masterclass about the 12 stages of business. You know what I learned from that? I’m going to redo it. We’re going to do it live. It’s probably going to be three hours long. There was so much really good information there. And most of the people who came to that call weren’t even in the position to listen to the last half of it.

[00:14:18] So the time we did spend was just on the first three to four steps because that’s what they needed to hear. I was willing to tweak that presentation. I checked in with them. I found out what they needed. I don’t see that as a failure. I see it as gathering information and now I’m going to present something even better and I’m going to give them even more value and I’m still not going to charge them.

[00:14:43] Do you hear what I’m saying? Do you know how many hours I spend coming on here? Talking to you, coming up with content, coming up with concepts, explaining it, taking myself through the process, taking my clients through the process. All of this is free value. So when someone listens to it, they’re like, Oh my God, that makes so much sense.

[00:15:03] I understand what she’s saying. She can totally help me. I’m earning your business or you earning your client’s business. Are you showing them what’s possible? Are you showing them what works for you? What works for your other clients? Are you showing them testimonials? You have to earn that. You have to earn their trust.

[00:15:25] You are not entitled to people just paying you money for no reason. That’s not what a business owner is. That’s not what a business owner does. And no one who has been successful six, seven, eight figures, no one believes that, sorry. Maybe it looks that way to you, but entitled people do not have sustainable, predictable and profitable businesses.

[00:15:50] We’re not entitled to anything. We’re grateful, we’re lucky, we’re blessed, and we love what we do, and it pays off. So I want to offer you that. Let me know if this was helpful, where BS is. Are you going to keep listening to the excuses? Are you going to keep a justifying and explaining all the reasons why you haven’t done yet?

[00:16:15] NO! decide today. You’re going to do it differently. You need to come into boss up. It’s so good. Everything I’m teaching you here. We break down, we do coaching around it. We do mentorship. We guide you to the next step. And I do an assessment with you and decide exactly which container, which tier you should be in because each one is different and it depends on the results where you’re at now.

[00:16:41] And then I guarantee to 10X your return on investment because that’s your capacity to receive. Your capacity to invest is your capacity to receive. See? Bet you didn’t know that. All right, my friends, have an amazing week and let me know if you are at the end of tolerating your own excuses and if you’re ready to get started to grow your business this year. 

Thanks for listening to this episode of More Than Mindset.

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