Ep #265 Leaving Corporate for Coaching: Char Wilson’s Journey

In this episode of Boss Up, I’m introducing you to my client and recent coach training graduate Char Wilson. 

Tune in for a dynamic conversation detailing Char’s transformative journey from a stressed out corporate employee to a thriving entrepreneur and mindbody coach.

What You’ll Learn:

  • Char’s personal and professional challenges.

  • The pivotal role of coaching in her transition.

  • The significant mindset shifts that propelled her towards success.

  • The importance of understanding, compassion, decision-making, and the continuous commitment to growth.

Char’s story serves as an inspiring example for high-achieving individuals looking to overcome anxiety and embrace confidence and ease in their journey toward achieving their dreams.

Get the Simple Business Trifecta — my unique framework used to sell over a million dollars in offers organically — for FREE! Get it here! 

Listen to the Full Episode:


Featured on the Show:

  • Connect with Char HERE.
  • Tune in to the free business masterclass: Why You’re Not Getting Clients and How to Change That: Sign up here.
  • Get a free 14-day trial of Boss Up Mentor! Register here. 
  • Access my unique framework used to sell over a million dollars in offers organically — get it here!

Full Episode Transcript:

Ep #265: Leaving Corporate for Coaching: Char Wilson’s Journey

[00:00:00] Hello, and welcome back to the show, guys, I’ve got some really good stuff for you today. If you are an entrepreneur, a business owner, a woman in power, this call is for you. My client Char is here today, I would say my client, friend and peer now because I really think that a lot of what you’re doing and what I’m doing is like the bridge to something else.

[00:00:57] Do you feel that way? Like, I feel like this has been a great relationship and what I’ve been focusing on. In my own transition in my own life is a lot of what Char is going through. It’s just in a different way. So I’ve never worked in corporate. I’ve never had another job. But I’m still going through these leaps and bounds of changes.

[00:01:17] Char has done this from corporate to a coaching business. And what we have in common is mind body coaching, and that’s really understanding how to regulate the nervous system through these changes. And that’s what we’re going to talk to you about today. We’re going to share the, let’s just say, we’re going to spill the tea on what it’s really like.

[00:01:35] Wasn’t always so pretty. Right. It looks great on the outside because we tend to come out, you know, the Phoenix like, Oh, here’s the rising part. Let’s talk about the ashes just to kind of take a peek on the inside. So Char, I want to let you go ahead and introduce yourself so you can tell a little bit about your background and what got you here today.

[00:01:58] Yeah, so my name is Char Wilson. I’m the owner of Wilson Phoenix Wellness. Love the reference there I’m an integrative mind body coach trained through Kim. I’m a mind body practitioner. I guide yoga and breathwork classes at some studios in town I’m in Austin, Texas living in tiny home with a tiny dog and I’m also a Reiki master But this is this is newer to me.

[00:02:21] I’ve said a lot of people that it It is a newer profession within the last year, I’ve made the shift from corporate to coach and in the healing space, but it does not feel like I’ve never done this before. It feels like it’s a remembering of skills that I’m just recrafting, remastering. I’ll be forever grateful that my friend, Emily helped me connect with, with Kim because there’s no way that I would be where I am in my coaching business without your coaching support, the business coaching Boss Up VIP, no way. I’d be where I am. What do you, what would you say has been the most significant thing about learning this type of coaching? Because you didn’t come from a coaching world, you came from a corporate world. Mm-Hmm. . Yeah. I came from a corporate world.

[00:03:04] I knew how to follow directions. I knew how to be like the best gold star employee. All the accolades, the title, the money, all the things. But I had actually never received coaching. I had a very small stint with therapy when I was going through my divorce in 2019, but coaching was like, it was not even on my radar until I went through a master breathwork coaching course.

[00:03:26] I was still working in corporate, I’d gone through yoga teacher training and that kind of totally opened up my interest to the world of holistic healing and wellness. And that led me to Breathwork. I did an eight month intensive Breathwork mastery course through Soma Breath. And that was the first time that the coaching aspect started to be teased out because they were training us how to be one on one personal coaches, but using it through functional or kind of medicinal style of breath work. And that made me very real, you know, aware of, oh, I, I want to go in this direction. I actually want to be a coach. I want to work when I want, I want to work in groups, but I don’t know how to bridge that gap yet. So it’s like, I had all these disparate certifications. I found sound healing. I went and got Reiki and then I was just like, what do I do with this now?

[00:04:16] And, and that was, that was the moment where you know, mutual friend of Kim and I pulled me in and she was like, I think. I think Kim can help you put the puzzle pieces together and in the container of being a mind body coach. And I didn’t have to hear much more than that. I was like, I’m in. Sign me up.

[00:04:34] Yeah, and when you first came in, we were taking You’re other skill sets integrating and just moving into the business. Like that’s, you were like, okay, I’ve already got the coaching thing. I’ve already got the breath work. How do I package this? We packaged it. But early on you move, you came all the way into the coach.

[00:04:49] So you’re like, you know what? I want that too. And so I would say that that’s, that’s probably the common path for most people who come in. I think from the outside, we think coaching is coaching on the inside. You realize. The coaching modalities are very different, like what you alluded to with breathwork coaching, mindset coaching, mind body coaching.

[00:05:14] How would, now that you’ve had experience with all of those, how would you differentiate it to the audience? Because most people are still new to coaching. We’re in denial if we think everybody knows about coaching. Yeah, I mean, I couldn’t have really, you know, I’ve heard of life coaches before, but I didn’t really have a grasp on it.

[00:05:30] I think I lumped them in with. But with therapists or psychologists, I was like, yeah, they’re just over here, you know, helping people work on their mindset, not feel crazy like I felt at the time in corporate world. But now I understand the thing that’s coming up for me is I grew up Baptist very conservative Baptist home.

[00:05:51] And the way the Baptist role is, it’s like all bets are off. It’s the wild, wild west. There is no hierarchical structure in the Baptist denomination. Every church, church that you go to, excuse me. It’s going to have a slightly different flavor and, you know, value system and the way that they talk and the way they leave their services.

[00:06:12] And that kind of is for me, a really good example of what it is like in the coaching world. Yeah, it, it really is, which is, which is a blessing and a curse, you know, like there, there could be some really crappy coaches out there that have not dealt with their own stuff. They’re not clean. With their unhealed wounds.

[00:06:32] And so it’s just kind of filling out, but I, but I know, and I, and I see, I witnessed in other mind, body coaches, which right now we’re a small crew. Like we are a smart, small niche crew of highly advanced coaches. I often tease that I feel like I’m a life coach and a somatic therapist. And you know licensed therapist, cause we’re pulling all of those facets in, it’s like those people had a baby.

[00:06:59] And that’s what I offer. Yeah. I’m offering you the best of all the world in a one stop shop because I’m going to be able to offer you the traditional, you know, CBT, the cognitive behavioral therapy, the nervous system regulation, the somatic component, the mind component, belief manifestation, all of it.

[00:07:18] And I don’t know if you can find that outside of the mind body coaching training that you offer. I don’t know if it exists. You know, there was a podcast I listened to on the Joe Rogan show with Joe Rogan and oh my gosh, his name just slipped my mind Andrew Wall. And there is a part, I cut it out.

[00:07:34] And they talk exactly of this. And it’s like, what are they like 12 in the world? You know, that they have the component of the mind and the body and the soul and bring it all together and, you know, give you the tools to have like what you want out of life. And I was like, and my podcast producer at the time, this was when I first started years ago.

[00:07:51] Sent me that podcast and said, Joe Rogan and Andrew Wilde know what you’re talking about and know what you’re doing. I think it’s episode 1213. I’ll have to, I’ll have to link it below here, but I still have it in my notes. They gave me the first moment of like, okay, this is why I’m so misunderstood. Cause there really aren’t that many people that are bringing all of these components together.

[00:08:13] But, which is going to be perfect segue into where we’re going. But when you’re in the trenches, all you feel is the rejection. When you’re in the trenches, all you feel is the disconnection. All you feel is people don’t want it. They don’t like it. It’s so hard to bring your mind into submission with what your soul knows to be true.

[00:08:37] And I’m wondering. For someone who’s in the corporate world, because we have lots of employees in this world, more than we have entrepreneurs. It’s kind of, I won’t say taboo, but it is kind of a woo, would you say that’s how a corporate mindset is? It’s like, cause it’s very tactical and practical and problem solving.

[00:08:59] And we’re, we’re more in that creative space and bringing all the parts and dancing and, you know, and moving. And then we’ve got this, wow. And do you think that has something to do with it, that the misunderstanding, like it just haven’t been exposed or haven’t needed it yet? Yeah, I think it’s interesting because I do from my time in corporate world, and I spent time, you know, I was in nonprofits, I was in tech startup, I was in an international companies, like all over the place.

[00:09:30] I had a very broad experience under the umbrella of corporate profession. And a lot of times it does depend on the ethos or the mission of the corporate company. I always, I tended to work for corporate companies that did have a heartbeat. I couldn’t just go be. A cog in a wheel. Like I’m, I’m not going to go just work at a massive place like IBM.

[00:09:52] I can’t do that. So the places that I worked did have a little bit more of an inclination towards at least mental health and wellness for their employees. I don’t think they fully understood it, but it looked good on paper, like it was a business decision to invest in their employees, health and wellness because it helps us to be more productive and happy and it helps with retention.

[00:10:14] Like it’s still a business line item, but they are shifting more towards I call that a holistic business owner or holistic business where they bring in all components. They realize family is important. Health is important. Like if they want their people to produce, they need to support those other parts of their life.

[00:10:30] That’s right. I think in a perfect world, what I would love to see, and I’m kind of like dreamcrafting for myself is that businesses have, they have coaches on consult for their employees, like how cool, how much benefit that would have been for me as a high, high performing employee who suffered from chronic anxiety.

[00:10:52] I didn’t even, I couldn’t even call it that at that time. I was like, I’m just hustling. I’m like, I’m working. I’m I got weird things going on in my body. I feel tense all the time. I’m stressed out. I would get to a boiling point and cry or just like, I got to take some PTO. I got to take a mental health day.

[00:11:08] Because I wasn’t, I wasn’t managing myself well, how impactful that would have been for me personally, but also for the business, like, how much better of an employee, how much more quality productivity could I have given to the business if they had had a coach on container for the business? You know, that’s, I don’t know if you know this part of the expanded vision, but it’s to come into the company, say you’re the owner, and I’m like, 90 days, we elevate your belief lid, we get you back in belief, because most business, especially first generation business owners, by the time they get to that million dollar marker, and above, they’re just kind of like, have had so much experience of things that have not gone well, right?

[00:11:52] So it kind of affects your belief. And so it’s like, expand it back, bring it back into belief, bring the employees on board, start developing their people. And my intention is to leave here with a trained coach on staff. And I go to another company. Have you heard me lay that out? Yeah. Yeah. So that way you’re not always dependent on us because I believe we should be fully holistic in house.

[00:12:18] We should have our marketing in-house, we should have our tech, like everything should be in-house in order to have like the, the functional algorithm of a business that has sustainability, profitability, and predictability. It has it all on board. So, love that you said that. Yeah. That actually just kind of came through in this conversation of like, oh, that would be fun of, of, you know, I’ve never really.

[00:12:43] Never. Let me drop that word. I’ve not yet considered being an executive coach that’s on call for a company’s employee group, but that is, it’s starting to come up for me because that’s where my, my ideal client, my high achieving woman. Who’s, you know, she can, she can produce, she will give you top quality results, but she is stressed out, and it is, it is impacting all of the other areas of her life.

[00:13:12] So she can’t keep up the pace. She cannot sustain that high achieving energy for long. At some point, she is going to burn out. She’ll go into a drop cocoon phase. And then she’ll come back out, but that pattern is going to keep repeating over and over again. And she thinks, like I thought, it’s the job.

[00:13:30] It’s too much work. I’m going to go to this employee and it’s going to follow her. Yep. Yep. And it’ll follow into your own business. Sure will. I’m just going to plant the seed and take that vision a little further so that I can kind of marry it with what’s marinating. Which is we go into the spaces and we train the coach to be that coach.

[00:13:55] So I’m just gonna elevate it a little bit and kind of plant that seed for you. coming. Let’s do that following. I hear you, . Okay. So let’s talk about how that exact scenario does follow you all the way to your own business. And how that looked, cause it wasn’t always pretty. This, this is hard work. And I think that’s why we don’t have a hundred percent success rate.

[00:14:17] You know, it’s like when it starts getting tough, when that grind starts getting pokey, all the other unhealed stuffs comes up. You, the mind instantly goes into a warning and alert and warning and alert and back off and pull it down. And I remember this happening and it’s like, hold on, this is not the same scenario.

[00:14:36] So I want you to just share it from your perspective, because I think we have a lot of people right now that are moving from corporate to coach that could benefit from your story and from your awareness of thinking it was that. And I’m not going back into brand and then realizing it was actually something different.

[00:14:53] You want to share that? Yeah, I think the thing that has always kind of kept me locked in and climbing the corporate ladder was it was fear. Initially, it was like, I need to have this safety net. I need to have the stability of the container that being an employee provides. Like, I don’t, I don’t have to think of all of these other business things.

[00:15:19] I certainly want to be a leader. I want to make an impact, but I’m going to get a regular paycheck and that feels okay for me. And that worked for a long time. I was an elementary music teacher, then I worked for many, many years in nonprofit and then I shifted into business. So I was always reporting to someone else, someone else was telling me what to do and I did it very well.

[00:15:40] But there was also always this resistance. And like, I’m being, I’m being contained at like, I want to break out of it, but I’m too afraid to. So I’m going to stay here. And you know, it’s, it’s like we always say, we, we, we’re not ready to change until the pain of staying is greater than the fear of leaving and breaking free.

[00:16:03] So I was just the goldfish in the water that just kept getting, I was bigger and bigger. I was growing, I was getting bigger. I was getting smarter. I was growing in skills and masterful. And the container would. Was not growing at the pace that I was growing. And eventually I remember it was March of 2021.

[00:16:22] I was in the last weekend of my 200 hour yoga teacher training. And they were covering business that weekend. And just hearing from a few women that were like, yeah, I left the teaching field. I left corporate and I’m a full time yoga teacher and I teach private sessions and I make, I make fair amount of money.

[00:16:45] I make more dump more than I made as a teacher. It’s possible. And that, that, that set a seed inside of me. And I remember I walked into that yoga teacher training that weekend. I was in tears because I was just. So over being a corporate employee, I had spent hours and all my energy on some stupid PowerPoint preparing for, you know, the, the op, the chief of operations who may, he like, made my anxiety.

[00:17:13] I remember always being on call with him, and after the call I would feel like I need to, I either need to barf or I need to go take a nap because my nervous system would just get so ratcheted up from his expectations. So I remember very vividly that weekend, I, I re remember saying to myself. I’m going to give myself another year and then I’m out.

[00:17:35] I don’t know. I don’t know how that’s going to happen, but I’m going to start saving my money. I’m going to start mentally planning and preparing for that. I’m going to make some massive shifts in my life. I, I downgraded, I rented out my, my large home and moved into a tiny home. So I, I just tightened everything up and I started architecting my life, ramping up for that time when I was like, and now I’m done.

[00:18:00] Well, that timeline got sped up. My, my intention was to leave in March of 2022, like get my bonus, get my next round of stocks, all that kind of stuff. They did mass layoff. Last January and in January of 2023, and I remember getting the email and my reaction was not fear at all. I just looked at Justin.

[00:18:21] I was like, I think I just got laid off and I felt so relieved and I was like, I just felt like, thank you universe for, for the gift. You actually, we don’t know how it’s going to happen. Yeah. Yeah, and I was preparing. I was like, I’m quitting in March. This is the day. And that timeline got fast forwarded by two months almost to the day.

[00:18:43] And I just knew I was like, I have all these other friends, you know, it was a frenzy, everyone’s angry and they’re scared and they’re going right back into the trenches of, I got to get my resume touched up. I got to get back on LinkedIn. I got to network. I got to get a job. And I had none of that. I was like, I’m not going back.

[00:19:02] This is it. I’m not going back. I cannot go back. My body will not allow me to go back. I will die if I go back. I actually think that’s the driver that we need. I was telling someone this yesterday and I was like, what, what do you, what do you tell your brain? Cause actually it believes everything we tell it about what you can’t go back to.

[00:19:23] Cause if I didn’t have that anchor, I would quit. I want to quit every single day, but then I remember. And I’m like, I can’t go back to what was, I can’t out die exactly what you just said. And that’s what I’m hearing from a lot of the successful business owners is there’s this vision that we have planted of what will happen if we go back to what was, and that Is that’s the stake that keeps us going.

[00:19:48] Yeah, I would wither. I would very, very quickly wither. I would get sick again. I would immediately, like, I know my anxiety, my depression would come back. It would all come back. And it would feel like it was giving up on my dreams. So, so let’s talk about the not so easy days. Let’s spill the tea. I love it.

[00:20:13] Yeah. We’re spilling the tea. Yeah. Yeah. Days where you look good now, where it felt a little sloppy. Like the, it’s like that moment where you’re, you know, turning into the butterfly. It’s in, I mean, everything in your mind. Is telling you it won’t work. It’s telling you, you, you went down the wrong path.

[00:20:35] You’ve made mistakes. Like what, what was yours? What, what did that look like for you? Well, I never had the thought of you made a mistake. Go back to corporate. Thank goodness. I never had that, but I did have other thoughts of like, it was just like very, very hard coded in my cells of, well, if this doesn’t work out, like if you can’t hack it as a coach, then you.

[00:20:59] You can start like putting in more hours at a yoga studio or like work at Costco, you know, go be a barista, just chill out for a while while you figure things out. And I’m so glad I did go work at the yoga studios because I realized if I’m going to do a little side hustle, it better be something that makes me more masterful at my craft and helps me connect with the people that could become coaching clients.

[00:21:25] That’s it right there. For those who did not hear that. Say it again. I’m going to, it’s, it’s the connected, it’s the joint. Like you don’t want to go do something that’s disjointed unless you got to do what you got to do. To bring money to have a house so that you can survive so that you can eat. But I remember going through that and a lot of you guys will ask that, you know, what about this?

[00:21:49] It’s almost like it’s degrading if you take a job. It’s not, it’s like, is the job going to take you closer to the goal or your people there? Is it connected to what you want to be? Is it going to grow you as a person? Same thing happened with me when I started yoga. Yoga completely changes your life.

[00:22:07] Your outlook. Yoga is not a class. Yoga is a lifestyle. It’s an understanding. It’s a, it’s a tool of awareness that takes you to yourself. And I know there’s a lot of like in the religious world, there’s a lot of shunning about it, you know? And it’s the same thing with like some of these methodologies. And I don’t, it’s kind of weird, you know, cause when you’re in it, you realize, no, this has taken me so much closer to God.

[00:22:33] It took me back to spirit. Yeah. A hundred percent. Yoga brought me full circle around back to spirit, source, universe, God, whatever. I think it’s just a naiveness, you know, just an ignorance in the best sense of the word. So yeah, I did the side jobs. I got in with, you know, some younger studios that allowed me to, they I, I feel very, very fortunate that I, I got connected to a new studio in Austin and they had a big focus on breath work and sound healing in addition to yoga, so I got my foot in the door there.

[00:23:02] I actually bought a membership. I started out just showing up. I’m as a member, like I will pay you first, I will be a paying client and how can I get on your sub list? Like, what do you need me to do? What do I need to show you that I’m capable of teaching and then I got on the sub list and I just kept showing up as a sub and I just kept asking if there’s an opening, I want it.

[00:23:24] If there’s an opening, I want it. So by, let’s see, I lost my job in January. I think February and March. I kind of kicked, I kind of kicked back. I did a little, I did a little play occasion. With my severance package, and I also use that time because I don’t sit still for long. Like, I got, I got stuff to do.

[00:23:44] I finished up my certifications. I finished up my breathwork certification. I took on some free clients just to get some practice under my belt. I started in e school with you, kind of got my, my business ducks in a row, LLC, insurance, all those, all those things that I now realize. I could have waited several months before I got those, but I was like, I got to do these things.

[00:24:05] I was just following the rules. But I didn’t even really have my first paying client. My first paying client was in June of last year. I think I had two clients in June and I took them through a six week somatic practice. It was not mind body coaching because I was like maybe two months into the mind body coaching training with you.

[00:24:25] I didn’t understand it. I didn’t have enough confidence to start using that. So I was like, I can at least do yoga and breath work. I can help these people with their anxiety through that route. So I’ll be just making it up as I went. It was very messy. It was very messy. And I, I think I just kept kind of piddling around like I had, I don’t think I brought in any new clients in August.

[00:24:43] I looked back at my numbers last year and from June through the end of December, I brought in a little under 6, 000 total. And I had a little bit of shame about that at first. But I know that I got those results because you, you know, the results are a reflection of what you did or did not do. And I know that now.

[00:25:04] And I was so stuck in tactical, the tactical part. I was stuck in the tactical, I was stuck in the, in the tech component, like I gotta have all my backend set up perfectly. I need to have my landing page. I need to know how to explain what an integrative mind body coach is. I need to be able to, you know, just make myself look very proficient and professional and polished.

[00:25:29] And like, I wasn’t, I’m still, I’m still not totally. Why do you think that is so hard to receive? Because we’ve been saying, right, we say it all the time, but what do you think is, is it because of being in the polished corporate world that it was? The resistance was so thick because I’ve never one time told someone to hurry up and go get their LLC or to start their website.

[00:25:51] Like ever quit spending time on all that stuff. Go meet people, help people like that. That’s how I did it. So I couldn’t tell anyone to do this other way. I didn’t have all that stuff for like three years in after I was over, I don’t know, I think 365, 000 and I was like, okay, I probably need a calendar link or something, you know, some kind of.

[00:26:09] Oh, shit. Yeah, for me, it was definitely like corporate world professionalism coming through of no one’s gonna take you seriously. Yeah, okay. Okay. I get that. And in that world, you are correct. Right. You are correct. You’ve just entered another world where people just want to be helped. Right. And it’s not people who are going the traditional route.

[00:26:30] And I think that’s the hard bridge. Your clients are actually looking for something different than that world. They’ve actually, some of them have had negative experience in that world. And so they are looking for the holistic, they’re looking for the opening, but if you didn’t have the words for it yet, that makes total sense.

[00:26:46] Yeah, I was learning a new language because I knew I knew business speak. I knew how to talk business lingo and there’s kind of like in business world, you know, there’s like ROI KPI, there’s all these little, it’s business lingo, it’s business language. And a lot of times it’s, it’s just this word salad of business language, but everyone kind of knows they know the talk.

[00:27:10] Like if you’ve been in it long enough, you know, the insider code. And I was having to do that in coaching. I did not know. The insider code, I was looking for it. I was like, where, how do I become proficient really fast and coaching? Like, how do I get great at this in six months? Like that was my, that was my mindset of like, I’m going to be masterful at this in six months.

[00:27:33] And then people are going to pay me. I’m going to make 10, 000 a month. It will be easy peasy. I’m going to do that within like three months of starting. Yeah, I got this. And then that was not the reality. And I think that is where, that is where things started to, to crumble for me. That’s where my nervous system got really dysregulated again.

[00:27:52] Because I was like, I was playing around for a few months. I’m going to get my certification. I’m going to make 10, 000 a month. No problem. People are going to pay me. It’s not going to be that hard. It’s not going to be that hard. And then I underestimated. The amount of time and energy and discomfort and exposure that I was going to have to do just to get one freaking client to pay me a few hundred dollars.

[00:28:23] Yeah, I’m laughing, but it’s because you’re on the other side of this. Like, and I should have done this in the intro, but an introduce Chart as the six figure corporate turning six. Figure coach this year. Like I should have said that at the hook at the beginning part. And I didn’t. So I think we are like outside of all of that murky part, but the things that I wrote down just to kind of reintegrate for those who are listening of what sure said that was so brilliant is getting, getting work while figuring things out.

[00:28:51] So again. Underestimating what’s required. Yeah, you’re going to do this and this while you’re bridging to here. And doing that with something that is connected, not away from your industry, but closer to your industry and your clients. And she said something very important in case you guys missed it.

[00:29:09] She bought into what she wanted to be a part of. She bought into the studio, she asked for the sub, she didn’t go in. I want to be your number one, a plus teacher and not become a client first. I think that’s so important. Same thing with us. You came all in people who come in with me and stay in with me, show me that they have quality commitment and all in someone who comes from the outside and hasn’t even bought the product and wants me to bring them on the podcast.

[00:29:39] It wants me to hire them as a coach. I don’t like, you don’t know what I do. You haven’t even bought into it for yourself to be the client. I think that’s so important that you said that. And you’re going to see this as your business expands and grows, that there’s a lot that’s going to come through the door, but they actually aren’t a part first.

[00:29:59] So how do they even know? Like, how would you even know? So I love that you figured that out and you knew that. Intuitively, you said, I’m going to be, I’m, I signed up, I bought a membership, I became a client first. It’s reciprocity. It is reciprocity, but it’s the same thing in coaching. If you want to be a coach, you need to get coached, otherwise you’re taking your wounds, you’re projecting and reflecting, and you’re trying to save the world to save yourself.

[00:30:28] It’s very selfish. That’s what I love about the mind body coaching program. It addresses the individual. It’s not even so much about the process. It’s about you integrating and embodying the process in your life to get the results for yourself. If you miss that part, you’re going to miss the success. Yeah.

[00:30:45] I mean, as much as, as much as going through the mind body coaching program helped me to be a masterful coach in a very Chart period of time, I think the greater impact was it helped. It helped me to plug the gaps in my unawareness. It helped me to go deeper than I even thought was possible. Like I’ve been, I’ve always been a very aware, conscious person, but I did not understand.

[00:31:15] And I did not know how to change habits and behaviors because I didn’t fully understand them until I had someone like you and the other coaches as a mirror reflection of, Oh, I’m having a hard, I’m having a hard time. I keep getting stuck on explaining. It was very important for me to be able to tell people in words.

[00:31:38] This is what I do and this is why you should work with me I kept telling them telling them how instead of showing them because the mind body coach is It’s an experience. Yeah. And you really can’t explain that. It’s because, but it was coming from my wound of like being misunderstood. Like I had to, I have to defend myself.

[00:31:59] I’ve been misunderstood my whole life. You know, being raised in a religious environment, there was always this pressure to evangelize, to defend. And so I was really, really stuck in that loop and it, it was not bringing in the client, unfortunately, because the energy I was putting out was like, Like, please someone pay attention to me, hear me, pay me, give me a chance.

[00:32:24] It was desperation. Me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me. Yeah. And that, that was a huge shift for me. We had a call one time. I remember one of the many calls where I was just in tears and you helped me to see like all of the energy right now is. It’s in me. It’s, it’s focused on how I’m perceived to the world. I, I remember, you know, I, when I was first doing like my daily social media posts, if I was not on social media until coaching, and then I realized, okay, I gotta, I gotta expose myself.

[00:32:57] I hid for several years on social media after my divorce. And then I just realized this is part of it. I got to come, I got to start exposing myself coming back out. And I remember, you know, it’s messy. It’s messy in the early days. And I would have some posts that had. Very little engagement and it felt like the visceral sensation was like I had walked onto a stage because I grew up singing.

[00:33:22] I grew up on stages. I walked onto a stage and everyone just kind of like walked out. Of the theater. And they were like, boo. Boo! That was I thought you were going to say, I walked into the stage and forgot to put my clothes on. No! I walked into the stage ready to like, ta da! And you just walked away.

[00:33:44] Here’s my thing. And they were like, boo. Don’t want it. It hurts so much. I took it so personally. And so I just kept going back and forth between like, I’m going to come out and then I’m going to go hide, depending on how much engagement I got. Yeah. What I love working with you the most is. It’s the humbleness and asking questions like the, the sheer courage and resiliency to, I’m going to show up.

[00:34:12] I’m going to raise my hand. I’m going to regulate through this experience, even though it’s hard. That is what I have seen you do over and over and over again. And I know you have the quality of being an entrepreneur, being a business owner, the sustainability, the predictability, and the profitability. And I know we don’t often see that in ourself, especially when we are bossed up women.

[00:34:35] We, you, you, I’m going to assume this. I’ll just say it from my perspective. I still assume I’m way down here. And so I’m like, always, always, and that’s kind of the, the misunderstanding is actually we’re here and we’re not understood. We were, we think we’re here, so we keep trying to be understood, but we’re actually beyond it in, in like the mental capacities or the understanding is beyond it.

[00:34:57] It’s weird. It’s not about levels. It’s not about higher or lower. It’s not what at all I’m saying it’s. And my son was saying this the other day and he was, he said, it’s like, I’m still a kid trying to, trying to get the position. I didn’t realize he’s the boss, like he is the position and that there’s an expectation from others because of that.

[00:35:16] But when you think you’re here and you’re fighting from here, that’s where that convincing comes in. That’s where that trying to be understood comes in. It’s so tricky and I see so many bossed up women there. I think we’re so used to climbing and fighting, you know, and what we’re most afraid of is exactly that they’re just going to get up and walk away.

[00:35:35] They’re just, they’re just like, not going to look, we don’t even realize that the algorithms just not showing the post. Right. Because to us, sometimes I would just like. Pay a few bucks. Oh, to get a few likes. Like, oh, it feels so good. I just need, I just need someone to tell me I’m pretty. They like me. No shame here.

[00:35:55] Give me some likes. I need help. I don’t want to stay in the game, especially the bigger it gets. You think that’s going to go away. It never goes away. It just goes from having no one on the call to having three people. To having 30 people, but your mind is still wanting 303, 000. It’s just as painful. It’s the craziest thing.

[00:36:13] I wanted to mention something that you said about corporate that you might find entertaining. I have made like over a million dollars in coaching before I knew what a KPI was. Like I’m sitting, I’m sitting in a business train, like I’m sitting in, my husband is with me and I, he said, you don’t know what a KPI is?

[00:36:33] And I said, no, would you tell me so I don’t have to ask? We looked it up. I looked it up on my phone. I did not know what a KPI was and I didn’t know what a SOP was. That’s why I love working with first generation business owners. We have talent, grit and resiliency. We make shit happen. We don’t know systems and processes in corporate talk because we’ve never done it.

[00:36:56] Yeah. And so that language that you had to come in and learn from us, I had to learn. From like, I had to, I spent the last probably about 28 months now on leadership. I didn’t know how to lead, which is why I couldn’t find team members. I couldn’t find employees. I couldn’t, because I thought they were me. I was looking for me and I was treating them like me.

[00:37:14] And it was like one phrase of that awareness. So there’s such a disconnection between those two worlds. And I love that we can speak it from different perspectives. I’m chuckling inside because I’m realizing. Like in this moment, as you say that I came in to being an entrepreneur, not knowing what that meant.

[00:37:35] And, you know, and you were like, there’s so much, there’s different variations. It’s like, you’re not an entrepreneur yet. You’ll be there when you make X dollars. And you’re at scale. And so, and I came in it from an operations lens. I always worked in customer success or operations. And so everything was about how can we eke out more efficiency?

[00:37:55] How can we scale this? How can we automate this and keep it personalized? So I’m coming in and I’m trying to scale my business that does not exist. And it was so frustrating until I finally just realized like, Oh. Like, you don’t, you really don’t need to have all the systems perfectly. You don’t need templates right now.

[00:38:18] Not until you’re at a million bucks or over. You don’t need any of that. Yeah, we do this with breakpoints. Right? People don’t know you exist. People need to know you exist. Step one, but when you say that everyone is calling it a business, like, Oh, I’m a Reiki practitioner. I’m a massage therapist. I’m a coach.

[00:38:33] I have a business. We talked about this at the great American speak off this weekend. So Pete was, I was with the judges and I mean the coaches. So I’m in the rooms where they’re giving the feedback. I’m not on the stage. I didn’t participate. I was behind the scenes. I did the VIP route and I was like trying to get all the goods.

[00:38:47] And he asked every person like, are you in business? Are you doing this for business? How much did your business generate last year? And he’s like, guys, We need congruity here. It is not a business. You haven’t made any money. You got to quit calling it a business. There’s confusion, you know? And I was like, Oh, thank you for saying it.

[00:39:05] I get so many inquiries about coming into Boss Up, coming into eSchool, coming into the business training part, and they don’t actually have a business yet. They don’t have, they don’t know who they’re serving, they don’t know what their product is, and I think it’s coming, it’s exactly what you’re saying.

[00:39:24] It’s actually an innocent ignorance. It’s not, there’s not like, it’s not like bad you for being that way. That’s why the first thing I teach are the four stages. And it’s like, first of all, you’re an amateur. You’re trying to figure out if you have a business, if you have a product that the public wants to buy, is there a market for what you do?

[00:39:41] That’s the first step. And then you go straight to the solepreneur. I would trade my anything for this. It doesn’t matter if I make money, just let me do it. It’s what makes me feel alive. So your soul is contributing and you don’t necessarily need to be paid in money or revenue. Then you move into the solopreneurship, which is where you are now and doing so beautifully.

[00:40:03] But how cool was that to finally see that and not be confused? Because the entrepreneur is like sculling what they have and their business is existing without them. They’ve created a product from nothing that the world just took off with. It took the pressure off. It took the shame away because my brain went to, you know, again, thinking, speaking from the high achieving, the overachieving place, the expectation is I’m going to move from point A to point B and I’m going to be perfect at point B.

[00:40:33] On day one. Yeah, I’m gonna I’m gonna rock this and the reality and you know, rewind the tape of every time that I changed careers started at a new job within two years. I was masterful. I was an expert. I was a leader. I was a teacher. And so I had to keep reminding myself of that. Like, you’re, you’re not masterful right now.

[00:40:54] How could you be? You’re a novice. You’re a student. Take away this, this pressure, this expectation that you have to be perfect right now. You’re not a business owner yet. You’re not profitable yet. Be the student. Give 100 percent to being the student. There’s nothing wrong with that. There’s no shame in that.

[00:41:14] It does not make you less than or defective. It’s part of the journey. Yeah. And that trying to be perfect kills, it actually slows down the process. Oh my gosh. That’s why I made less than 6, 000 in seven months last year. Sure. Listen to me. I know. Stop. Well, as soon as I did, it was, I don’t know the exact day.

[00:41:43] I posted about this on my Facebook the other day. I know where we were sitting when we had the conversation. I was sitting in the driveway at my house in between the two yards. On the phone with this, like, let’s sink into this. Is that the conversation you’re talking about when you had the realization?

[00:41:57] It was either that one, or it was the one where you texted the group. You’re like, Hey, I have a free 30 minutes I’m driving. Call me if you want a coaching call. And I was like, I finished driving and I just sat in the yard. And I think that that was, I don’t know, maybe in January, early January, it was either late December, early January.

[00:42:19] And I just, after that call, I was like. I am done with self doubt, like I’m just really done with it. I’m over it. It’s not cute. It’s not serving me. It’s keeping me stuck. I have big goals. I want to be a six figure earner. I deserve to be a six figure earner. I’ve done it before, many times. Why couldn’t, like, why couldn’t I?

[00:42:44] I have always, within a year or two. Become a master of my craft and made the money that I set my mind to make. Always. I have all this evidence and my mind is searching for evidence that does not exist. It’s searching for like this pretend story of you’re going to flop and you’re going to be poor and you’re going to, you know, you’re not going to be able to travel, you’re not going to be able to live the life that you want to live.

[00:43:10] You’re going to be dependent on somebody. And I just decided, you know what, I’m, you know, I’m really smart and I’m a really hard worker. And. Everything that I know from mind body coaching is once you have the awareness and you have the understanding, which I did in that moment, then it’s about a choice.

[00:43:33] That’s all you need. You need the awareness first. You need understanding of why and a lot of compassion in that understanding place. And then you choose. And in that moment, I was like, I choose to be done with self doubt. I choose to do something different and actually go all in on myself. I’m going to believe in myself.

[00:43:58] That’s my choice. I love that you just, I just put up a post this morning with this exact thing. And I said, there is power in the decision. It’s the, they’re in the, when you made that decision instantly, the world, the seas part for you in the decision. My body relaxed. That’s right. Clients started coming to me in the first two months of 2023.

[00:44:23] I have made more than I made in the last seven months of 2022. She said, I love this. I have three times the amount of clients and four times the money. And I was like, that, that is a success story. Three times the amount of clients, four times the amount of money is exactly what we want our new business owners to be saying that is, that was like, perfect.

[00:44:52] You, you were just saying, let me see what I wrote right here. So the, the awareness, the understanding, the compassion, the decision that is that the order you’re saying, like, it’s like that pause. And then the compassionate opening, curious, compassion, and then the decision, then is the flow. Well, after the, after the decision, it’s the commitment to keep making that decision.

[00:45:27] Oh, of course, of course. Yeah. But then I think that they’re what they’re think most people are trying to do is they think, Oh, I decided the flow is going to come and then I’m going to believe. I’m trying to articulate the order, which is like, whoa, what, everything we do in mind, body coaching Chare is like laying out the process of, but it’s like, the next step is choose, commit, be as though it were cut away and continue.

[00:45:56] But the, the part I see most new business owners, we’re going to call them business owners is. I’m going to put it out. It’s going to come and then I’m going to believe and go get it. Like it does not happen that way. And I think if more people could understand exactly what you just said, understand with compassion, the openness and the understanding, and then that openness is what brings and then you move with it.

[00:46:25] Yeah. There’s, it’s, it’s, I would call it bypassing. It’s like taking a belief, like I am a six figure business owner and then go not getting the result. That’s where they stop. What would you say? Like, I just want to kind of pick it apart right here. Such a stuck point. Yeah. I’m going to do this. I believed you can do this.

[00:46:45] Like, let’s go. You underestimated what would be required. It didn’t happen. That’s where the severance happened. It wasn’t because the clients didn’t come. It was because you were in the way of the process. You had the process backwards. I had, I had incorrect expectations. I had incorrect expectations of the amount of effort.

[00:47:06] And time that it was going to take that you reacted to if you wouldn’t have reacted to it and you would have understood it is what I’m saying right and now and now like the nervous system is regulated I’m like oh this is just part of the process I’m going to keep doing the work the clients will show up I am going to keep doing the work guys y’all have to hear this there are so many gems in this conversation I remember specifically like sitting in the driveway here Sitting at the airport and in a hotel room in Vegas, those three conversations we could probably break down, but I bet you would say are the three most pivotal points in this transformation.

[00:47:48] Do you remember the one at the airport? It was about working. I wasn’t at the airport. I don’t know where I was. I remember. That’s how significant these conversations or these points of getting it is. And all of you are doing the same thing. The moments of when the perception changes. You get this 360 understanding.

[00:48:14] You have to get out of your way. You’ve got to get out of the old, this old thinking pattern. That first call shift was the first call shift that was really, really huge. And I want to say that was, I want to say that was in the summer because then like by October I started getting clients and money, something shifted in October.

[00:48:38] So I feel like we probably had a conversation in August, September, July. I was at, I was in Vegas in July. Okay. And then graduating from the mind body program in October, that was a really intense window of time that summer. It was literally a dry spell. I would say that was the airport part. That was the part where you were starting to do.

[00:48:59] And then you had people in your life that it was changing. It was different. It wasn’t all on the same page and the old habits had come back and we were moving through that. Not to get into all the gory stuff. Yeah. Just saying that the, I want everyone to see that’s listening to this, that it wasn’t just, I decided I’m going to like go on my own and create a business. There were break points in Char’s story. There were break points in her process to getting there. Same with me, same with you. There’s break points in the business. So she came from corporate. So she’s coming from a million dollar company with a million dollar mindset with a company that hadn’t made a hundred dollars yet.

[00:49:37] That’s, that was the first thing. So you were at a break point way over here when you hadn’t built the foundation yet. The six figure foundation is different from the seven favorite figure accelerator. So it was just a not understanding that now that you’ve been through this process. Oh my god You can help anyone get through anything because the hardest Hardest thing for humans to come through is to earn more money to break through scarcity To be open to love.

[00:50:03] Those are the two Most scary, painful things that we will ever do as humans, and both of those are required because you had to trust me. You had to open and allow me to, to, to show you something you weren’t seeing yet. That, that requires a lot of trust, especially when we’ve been wounded in other relationships.

[00:50:24] And then to break through these, these actual break points of what it’s going to look like when your mind had an expectation that it was going to look different. It’s just, the work is so beautiful, so addicted. That’s why people that like, that’s why I believe that everyone needs a coach for those two reasons, because you need someone who can see beyond what you can see in the moment.

[00:50:45] You’re in the mud. You need, you need the tow truck person. You use this analogy all the time that can see like, no, but look, it’s pretty up here. There’s flowers and trees. You’re just down in the mud. You can’t see it yet. So I’m gonna hook up my winch to you and I’m, we’re gonna work your way out of this mud.

[00:51:03] I needed someone who believed in me more than I had the ability to believe in myself at that time. I needed someone who was gonna fight for my potential instead of beliefs. My My beliefs. Your beliefs, my, my habit. Yeah. You never believed my story. You just believed in my potential and you just kept.

[00:51:21] Fighting for it. It was ridiculous. I was like, why can’t you see what I see? Like we can’t see past where we are. We just, we just can’t, we need someone else to do that. And then we need someone to keep pulling up the winch. And that’s what a coach gives you. We’re going to get out of here. I want to make sure that your link is below so anyone can find you.

[00:51:41] But I do want to plug in something. Cause I want, I want your potential clients and your people to understand where we’re coming from. And I think we relate on this part is we are Bossed Up, man. We, we like we’re tough. We’re going to do, we’re resilient. We’ve got a lot of grit, but what is a lot of, I’m not even going to say women or men or like just people in general don’t realize is the gentle compassion required for someone like us.

[00:52:06] And I want to say that because I know your client is badass on the outside. You said it earlier, the understanding and the compassion. And I want to leave that like, I want to leave that here with whoever is listening to this. That is a go getter that because you know who your person is, right? They’re already the top, they’ve climbed the ladder and they’re so used to being hard asses on themselves.

[00:52:32] And it’s actually the gentle compassion and the understanding and the support that breaks us. That’s right. It’s, it’s an unfurling. As soon as we start adding in compassion, instead of beating ourselves up. It’s the same, you know, our other podcast of moving from like punishment to partnership with my body.

[00:52:53] It’s the same thing of just the entirety of who I am. I had to shift from being, being the judge and jury of myself to being my biggest advocate. That perfect way to end it. So Char, we’re just put you a link below where I think we both have a call in two minutes. So we’re going to hop out of here. Do you want to just say real quickly who you work with?

[00:53:18] Yeah, I work with high achieving women. I help them to erase anxiety so that they can actually enjoy their success with confidence and ease. And Char’s in Austin. If you’re there, look her up, head to a yoga breathwork class. And otherwise she is online and you’ll see her around the community. We’re not done yet.

[00:53:35] We’re just getting started. Just getting started. Thank you. Welcome. Thank you for coming on and being so vulnerable. 

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