My guest this week is something of a familiar voice here on the podcast. Danielle Perrodin is my integrative style coach, and we’ve been working together intensely for around a year. So, I want to share with all of you the benefits and takeaways I’ve received from our experiences together working towards stylistic freedom and liberation.
Danielle Perrodin is an integrative style and image coach who has made it her mission to help holistic leaders with their style, to step out and embody confidence in promoting themselves and their business. Image is a big deal, and we’re discussing how she’s helped me in this area, and how these lessons will help you too.
Tune in this week as I discuss with Danielle why our outward image is such a vital part of how we move in the world. I’m sharing what has transformed for me as a result of my work with Danielle, and she’s giving us her tips for decluttering your closet while decluttering your mind at the same time.
Join me in Self Healing Masters, a program to heal your health, wealth, and relationships. Enrollment gets you lifetime access to my integrated healing approach so you can finally live your life’s purpose and help others. I can’t wait to see you there!
What You’ll Learn From This Episode:
- Why your style and image are so important, both to you and other people.
- My personal experience of working with Danielle on my style and image and how it has transformed.
- How working with Danielle unexpectedly relieved so much mental and emotional pressure around how to present myself.
- Why making changes in your style and image is about way more than just throwing everything out and changing your wardrobe.
- The importance of listening to our inner voice and tuning out how society wants us to show up.
- Why so many people have become addicted to the thought, “I don’t know what to wear.”
Listen to the Full Episode:
Featured on the Show:
- Join me in the More Than Mindset Facebook group!
- Check out my new YouTube channel!
- Follow me on Instagram!
- Follow me on Clubhouse @kimguillory and click the bell to get notified of upcoming classes! You can ask for an invite in the More Than Mindset Facebook group.
- Danielle Perrodin: Website | Facebook | Instagram
- Danielle’s Freebie: The Closet Edit
- Ep #95: Style Your Mind and Body with Danielle Perrodin
- Ep #53: Step Into Being Seen with Danielle Perrodin
Full Episode Transcript:
Welcome to More Than Mindset, the only podcast that bridges the gap between spirituality and success. Go beyond the mind with clarity and confidence Coach Kim Guillory and learn how to integrate your passion to serve with your skills and experience to create a business you love. Let’s get started.
Kim: Hello, hello. And Welcome back to the show. Kim here, and my guest, Danielle. You guys have heard from Danielle in previous podcasts. Danielle, do you remember the numbers of the podcast that we’ve done in the past?
Danielle: No, I do not remember the numbers.
Kim: Okay. Well, anyway, Danielle is back. She is my integrative style coach. We’ve been doing a lot of work together and I want to share the benefits and the takeaways of what I’m receiving with my audience. With you guys who want to have this sense of freedom, since we’re right here at Fourth of July. I was thinking about what a perfect time to feel liberate and to give some takeaways of how you can get this for yourself. That’s what I wanted to share with you.
Danielle, how long have we been doing this work? It’s over a year, right?
Danielle: Yes, it seems like whenever we first started, it was when I was really trying to figure out what my program was going to be. So really, you were one of my first guinea pigs. So it’s been at least a year. Officially as a client it’s been about six months.
Kim: So Danielle, do you want to introduce yourself?
Danielle: Sure. So my name is Danielle Perrodin. I am an integrative style and Image coach. I am also a pharmacist of 16 years, wife, mom of three, I live in South Louisiana, not too far from Kim. So the knowing of Kim and have trained with her as an integrative life coach, I want to say about three years ago, I guess. Seems like forever.
But yeah, so I help holistic leaders with their style to step out and embody confidence to promote themselves and their business.
Kim: Which is a big deal.
Danielle: It really is.
Kim: For somebody like me that was doing the scuba diving, deep, dark, work behind the scenes, I was super comfortable there in my yoga clothes, or whatever. My bike riding attire, whatever I was in that day. And it was very easy. But now that we’ve really stepped into this digital world, we have to be a little more mindful of it. I can’t quite do what I used to get away with, we have so many more online people and image is a big deal.
Danielle: Yes, your image is a big deal. Style does matter whether you want to accept that or not, there’s science that backs it up. People do see and take in what you’re wearing. First impressions are a real thing, but it’s also how you feel.
Kim: Yeah, that’s what I was going to say.
Danielle: So there’s a message that you’re sending to other people, but you’re also sending it to yourself.
Kim: Well, it wasn’t the concern of what someone else thought about me, it was the concern of what I was thinking about me. The judging and comparing and not feeling confident, not knowing what to wear. Like that bridge between the caring and the not caring was very painful.
We have done some really deep work to get beyond this, because my story was, I don’t care. It doesn’t matter. It’s inconvenient, it’s not available for me. And after session after session hearing myself say that over and over and over, I’m like, “Oh my god, this is exactly what the problem is.” Because it does matter. And I do care.
Danielle: Correct. And so your reality, the image that you were portraying, that you were living, it was coming from your thoughts, as does everything else, right?
Kim: Well, I’ve heard this since this work that we’ve been doing together. Now that I realize there’s some importance to it, I should just say that. It just wasn’t important before because what was important was the actual work.
And because I was serving mostly people that I knew, it was pretty much a warm market, it didn’t really matter, they already loved me. So that impression, that image just kind of wasn’t there until I took the stage a few times and was honored with awards and presented with things and I’m like, “Holy crap,”
I remember with doTERRA I was in a dress with my yoga pants underneath. And it’s like I was just really fighting it. And I’m not the person who wears a dress, but I felt like I needed to present that way. I had to do or wear what everyone else was. And that’s something that the work with us doing together that’s absolutely not true.
Danielle: Right. And I think that’s what a lot of my clients have in common, is that they do think they have to dress a certain way to fit into whatever their profession, career, business, the people in their life dress. But that’s completely not true.
You should really spend the time to tap into who you really are and how you want to dress. And yes, there may be some rules or regulations for your job, or for society, but you can fit all of that in to be personal just for you and really have this self-expression, this self-message that you are intentionally sending out to the world.
Kim: Well, the things that were most impactful in the work that we’re doing together were complete surprises to me. It’s not at all what I thought. I remember when we first began, I was just going to throw everything and just go buy stuff again. It was like, “No, you’re not.” I’m like, “What?” To my mind that’s the black or white thinking though, right? That’s the all or none.
Danielle: Yeah, we think we’re just going to solve the problem by dumping everything out of the closet and then filling back up. But what happens is, you’re just going to fill it back up with all of the same stuff. So why not take this time to really have it to be something, a lesson, that you can learn about yourself?
So it’s not just about cleaning the closet. It’s really about getting to know who you are, how you’ve been showing up, how do you want to show up? And really cultivating that.
Kim: Yeah, what I was saying earlier is are you expressing or are you hiding? What are you expressing? What are you hiding? I would think I was definitely with the tent fashion. I was just going to wear a tent over my body and pretend like no one could see me. It’s like that’s where I was at.
And as we started doing the work and I started experiencing the liberation, the freedom, the ease, the calm. All of that busyness in my mind and that not knowing what to wear, the confusion, the pressure, there was a lot of pressure.
When I would leave to go on a trip, you remember I would call and text like, “Okay, I want to do this ahead of time.” But then my mind, the habits, the way I was doing it before is what I would keep doing. I’d keep postponing, I’d keep putting off. And then I ended up in California, calling you in 911 falling apart. Like, “I can’t believe I did this again.”
So what you just said is exactly what I had to experience. I had to get to know who I was and how I wanted to be represented. And there was no rule book telling me what that was going to look like. I wanted you to be that rule book. I wanted you to tell me, I wanted you to pick it for me. And that’s not at all what happened.
And I think that last breakdown really shed a lot of light of the habits that I just continued repeating. You can’t just throw money at the problem. I can’t just throw money at someone to send me what I need to be wearing or choose for me what I like or what makes me feel confident, or courageous or whatever that was. And I really did expect that from you.
Danielle: Right, yes, I know. But from the beginning it’s not about me telling you what to wear. It’s like society tells us what to wear every day. We see it on TV, we see it on Instagram, we see it in magazines, on ads. Society is always telling us what to wear.
What we’ve gotten away from is listening to that inner voice that’s telling me, “What do I want to wear? Who do I want to be? How do I want to show up?” And there’s also this sense of getting addicted to, oh, I don’t have anything to wear and being confused. And it serves us in some icky kind of way, it really does.
It stops us from moving forth with the photo shoot, with moving forth with the networking meetings. It stops us from moving forth in our business as long as we get to live in that reality. And it’s just a decision. Just like deciding to eat healthier or lose weight, going into your closet and facing your demons is just one decision away.
Kim: I did not want to go into the closet. I did not want to go into the drawers. And I did not want to get rid of anything because I had the belief that I wasn’t going to be able to find what I needed, or it wasn’t going to be available for me or whatever it was. So I had to hold on to all of this just in case.
Which is leading us into the conversation of today which is all about decluttering and the closet edit, which is a beautiful thing that you created. And let’s just kind of talk about that. How did you come up with that? Was there a time where you thought you just had to throw it all away and go buy new stuff?
Danielle: I feel like when I was younger I probably did that a couple of times. My issue was a weight issue. So I had gained about 20 pounds, I had always been super tiny and would fit in all the clothes, all the cute clothes. But then I found myself turning 40 with about 20 extra pounds and just kind of being unsatisfied where I was in my life.
And the turning point was when I couldn’t fit in my workout clothes. It’s like, “Okay, now what do you do? Like you have to go buy all new clothes.” And it’s like, “Do you really? Like nothing in here fits, really?” I had to just get serious with myself. Am I just going to go and spend tons of money when I know that this isn’t the problem?
Kim: I like to throw money at problems and have them dissolve and go away.
Danielle: They don’t go away; they just keep coming back. And I probably had done that a few times. But I had these new tools. So I was like, “Okay, well let me practice these tools on my closet.” Because this was actually before I decided that my specialty was going to be in style. It was just me doing it for myself. I had this newfound sense of energy and there was a lot of things that I had been ignoring in my life.
And there were junk drawers I was ignoring, there was kids rooms that needed to be updated and painted. And so I had all this energy. And so one day I just said, “Okay, I’m going to tackle the closet. I’m tired of feeling this way. I’m tired of having nothing to wear, and having to cancel out on events.” I just showed up confident. I felt great, I had this great energy. Now I wanted to look great. And really wearing the clothes that makes me feel that way.
Kim: Yeah, that’s the thing, feeling it inside and then not being able to express it. That’s where I was. Because I was feeling amazing. I was really getting very successful at what I was doing. And when it came to expressing, it didn’t match. It didn’t match who I was. My outside, my attire did not match who I had become.
And I’m just thinking whenever you said that I remember the day when I talked to you about the work that I wanted to do. And you’re like, “Okay, that’s what you helped me do. Like, how is this possible?” And I’m like, “That’s why I want to hire you. Because I know you know, right?” Because we can see it. We can see it in each other, but we can’t do it for ourselves.
Danielle: Yeah, I was like, “You already know all this stuff. What can I possibly teach you?”
Kim: Oh yeah, I was like, “Help me like to actually execute.” That’s the difference. We all know all of the stuff, all of this is free. Guys, there’s books, there’s YouTube. I mean, you can just google declutter and find all kinds of stuff, but not the way you’re doing it. That’s what’s different. That’s the actual, deeper transformation. Resolving those inner wounds.
I mean, my stuff was so deep. We’ve talked about that on the previous episodes, for those who want to hear me crying. And it coincidentally was the same story. Do you remember that? It was like the same story was still coming up and still coming up. Even though I had the awareness of it, I hadn’t quite made the shift around it because I still had those beliefs in the middle. There were still a couple of beliefs hanging around. And it was in my nervous system.
That’s what we did different this last time is I really did a lot of work about coming into beyond the mind and dropping in, and then actually changing the way my system was responding and reacting when it came to shopping or getting dressed for certain events. Because I as well bailed out of many things I have not attended. And I’m disappointed in myself because I really wanted to be there in celebration with family and friends but I just couldn’t get over myself.
Danielle: Yeah, I think what we did differently this time was actually you were taking the actions, and it brought everything to the surface. So I really do, I hold your hand, I walk you into the closet. And then yes, you have to go in the store with the face mask and yes, you have to try on different sizes, and you may not fit in them, and they may not look good on you. These are things that you have to go through to figure out what does look good on you, and what you do fit in, and what you do love. You have to face the things that you don’t.
It’s not always fun, but there’s definitely ways that you can make it more fun. And I think doing it together made it more fun for you.
Kim: Well, I was very mad at you. I remember getting in the car and I was like, “Listen, you just can’t let me get away with this stuff.” I was like having a childlike hissy fit. And I was like, I didn’t want to try on anything and I didn’t want to buy anything in there.
I was mad, it’s like in my mind, and I told you this, I was like, “You don’t understand. You don’t understand how hard this is for me. Or you don’t understand, I don’t have the same body type as you.” Because you’ve got this little petite figure, and I’ve got this like 5’9” large frame. I was like, “You just don’t understand. I just don’t know if you can help me with this.”
Danielle: I know and you really did. But here’s the deal, I see clients with all different body shapes. And looking back on, even when I was a size zero there’s parts of my body that I wanted to hide and were shameful of.
And I hear it from my clients, I’ve seen it in other women. The thin girls are ashamed of being thin, the bigger girls are ashamed of being bigger. The boobs are too big, the boobs are too small, the torso is too long, the torso is too short.
I have heard it all. It has nothing to do with the body that you are blessed with. And really just not giving it gratitude for everything it is and being present with it and dressing it the way that makes you feel alive and joyful.
Kim: Yeah, that makes so much sense. And I saw that when I was doing spray tans. And I mean, I always had like, hair, nails, tanning, yoga, so I heard all of those things with my clients. And I remember in spray tans, it’s like this little teeny tiny framed, perfectly this and this where oftentimes the most shame, like I had a really hard time getting their arm away so that the solution would dry. And then there was someone who was heavier or more robust, they didn’t have a problem at all. I was like, “Hold on, this has nothing to do with the body size.”
Danielle: Exactly. And so once you can get over that belief, it’s like we can move on to, “Okay, what else is there?” And there’s like, oh, I don’t like to shop, or I don’t have money to shop, or I don’t have time to shop or, I don’t know where to shop. There’s so many limiting beliefs.
Kim: They don’t make clothes for people like me. And then I’d look around, I was like, “Hmm, that could be a lie.” Seeing other people the same size. And it was really to throw doubt. Throw doubt at the problem, at the belief, to start seeing something different.
So let’s talk about how we can help people, or how you can help them. For someone who wants to get started, they’re feeling overwhelmed, they’re feeling confused, they have nothing to wear. The same stories that you just said, can you take us through a little journey of how to help? They want to throw everything out and start over because they think that’s the solution. Where would you tell them to start?
Danielle: All right, yeah, so what I would say is, it’s okay, it’s going to be okay. Deep breath, come to presence. Really, that’s the first step is coming to presence, calming your nervous system down. And it may be just putting a timer and saying, “I’m just going to go in there for 15 minutes.” Because here’s the deal, if your nervous system is out of whack, it’s in control, you’re just going to avoid.
So the first step is actually going into the closet, right? That is really the first step. So whatever you can do to do that, maybe you put on some music to get you into the mood, or you can even have some drinks or a snack. Whatever that looks like for you, just make it fun, get yourself super excited. You could even do it with a friend. So if you want to find a friend, get a friend. But just commit to yourself that you’re going to do it and get in the closet, that’s the very first step.
And so how we do anything is how we do everything. I love when you say that, and this is no different. I really took how I do everything in my life, which is getting clarity, designing a vision, and using those things and really embodying the three to move forward, taking those actions.
So the first step is clarity. So, once you’re in the closet, that’s the first step, right? So congratulate yourself. So we do a lot of celebration. I really believe in celebrating and feeling that in your body. And just get started. So getting really clear, what do you not love in your closet? Let’s start with that. I love sorting with easy, low hanging fruit. You know what you hate.
And your mind right now may be saying, “Well, I hate everything.” No, you don’t. You don’t hate everything in there. You picked it out, you purchased it, there was something that told you you loved about it. So just go in there and don’t overthink about it. Think, what do I wear often? Put that stuff aside and look at the stuff that you don’t wear anymore. It may be that it doesn’t fit you, so go ahead and try it on.
Face the reality, if it doesn’t fit it’s got to go. Because here’s the deal, the stuff that doesn’t fit you anymore is just making you really feel bad every single day.
Kim: I hear you saying that and I didn’t believe it because it was like, it’s not bothering anything, it’s just like off to the side. Until it was no longer off to the side. Now, I’ve experienced what you’re talking about. But it was really hard to get me in the closet. And I didn’t want to put no music on and I didn’t want to – I mean I was mad, I guess I should be apologizing.
Danielle: We did some essential oils with you, so that would probably be great too. So maybe you can recommend the essential oils that you had pulled out.
Kim: Yeah, I used balance, bergamot, or some say bergamont. And I even came to rose because a lot of my child wounds comes around the clothing. And so rose is a heart healer and it’s very calming and relaxing. But I remember grabbing, because bergamot has that citrusy uplifting, so it’s kind of like what the music does, but balance has that grounding. So I do remember that now. Because I did not, I didn’t even want to put music on.
Danielle: It was crazy. I was actually physically at your house and I was like, “Okay, get the essential oils, call in all the troops.” And the funny part is this was round two you had already gotten rid of so many things the first round. And I was really surprised that there was still some things lingering in here. But that’s what tells you that not the clothes, it was really something else going on.
Kim: I was bypassing. I was bypassing by doing the thing and not going into the thing.
Danielle: Didn’t work, yeah.
Kim: I’m so used to just like buckle down and just get it done. I can do that, right? And you were trying to slow me down and bring me into it, but I was just trying to get to the throwing the stuff out and getting the new stuff in. I did not want to go into doing the actual inner work that was around it.
And that’s what makes what you do different. You know, it is not just about styling, it’s not even just about mindset. It’s like the whole emotional processing and rewriting of the nervous system, rewriting of the old dialogue. But first being aware of it.
And so it’s like, I would just kind of tell you I was aware of it. But then I would bounce out of it. And because I’m so tough, like I have a very tough exterior energy, it’s like it’s a big protection. And so I was like, “Listen, you’re going to have to stay with me. Stay with me in the ring. I’m going to like want to knock you out, but I promise I won’t hurt you.”
Kim: Yeah, so the first step really is presence. And so actually holding the item and saying, “Do I love this? Do I not?” And the stuff that, you know, maybe there’s things in there that’s been there for 15 years. It’s like, “Do I still want to be this person?” If the answer is no, let it go. If you have any doubts set it aside, don’t overthink this low hanging fruit.
So once you get out all the things that don’t fit you, that you don’t love, that is maybe a different season completely. So if it’s summer, Fourth of July, we don’t need to have our heavy coats in this closet necessarily. We don’t need turtlenecks, that kind of thing.
So just get real, because what happens is you are subconsciously making those decisions to not wear those things every single day. Even though you’re not thinking, “Oh, am I going to wear this?” No, your brain is
Kim: For sure, for sure. That having it stay there is like that heavy blanket. And I remember one thing that was really impactful for us is, because I travel quite a bit, since we’ve been doing this I’ve had a few trips. And when I put my hand on it, is that something I would take with me? Is that something I would wear now? If I were leaving to go on that trip next week, would I bring that with me?
And that was one of the ways that helped me see the no. Because remember, I was really holding on to the not yet, just in case. I can’t get rid of it, I might get in a bind, I might get desperate. I might have to whether I like it or not. And you’re like, “No, we’re not keeping what we don’t like anymore.” And I’m like, “But there might not be anything else.” And I mean, that’s the story I kept coming back to.
Danielle: Mm-hmm, yeah. So that’s the part of unveiling those limiting beliefs. So whenever they come up write those down, take note of them. That’s what’s been keeping you stuck, those thoughts. But we’re rewriting the story, just like you said.
So the next step is vision. So really getting clear on who do you want to be? How do you want to look? How do you want to show up? How do you function in your life? If you go on a bunch of trips and you just have a bunch of clothes for a backup plan, then you don’t have the clothes for the trips. The other clothes is taking up the space. Maybe you just stay in yoga clothes and you just do yoga all the time. Well, you don’t need fancy dresses.
So it’s just really being clear on what does your day to day look like? But not just day to day, like really dream. What do you want your life to look like? Do you want to be going to fancy dinners with your husband once a week? But you have nothing to wear, so you already in your mind have decided that that’s not going to happen for you. Buy the dress for the fancy dinner once a week. And then that’s going to create results in your reality.
Danielle: You’re going to see the dress, you’re going to be like, “Oh, when are we going out? Let’s go.”
Kim: Well, it’s so much easier to choose to go when you actually know what you want to wear. You remember after we went shopping the last time and I called my friend, I was like, “Oh my god, let’s go out to eat. I have a new shirt.”
Danielle: Yes, that was exactly how it was supposed to work. So now you’re excited, you’re looking for someplace to go. As opposed to getting the call to go and you’re like, “I really want to go, but I’m going to say no because I have nothing to wear.”
Kim: Yeah. All right. So the first one is presence, the second one is vision.
Danielle: Right, and so once you’re really clear on defining your style, and you can do that with the integrated closet edit, what do you love? What colors do you love? Which fabrics do you love?
And so now you go shopping in your closet and find those things that you love. So you know, “Okay, this is going to stay because I fit in it and it’s in the direction that I want to go. It’s according to my five style words.” Yes, this is a no brainer, it makes it so much easier.
You don’t have to decide if it brings you joy or not, or if it’s whatever these other people say. It’s, does it fit into those categories? If one of the categories is I want to be confident. And when I wear this top, it makes me not feel confident, then you know it needs to go. So it’s just kind of black and white.
Kim: Confident, and comfortable, and convenient. You have to be able to like roll it up, wear it different kinds of ways. Let it be light and easy.
So you have all of this in your closet edit, right? Can you talk a little bit about that?
Danielle: Yes, it’s all in the closet edit. And the third thing is your why. So I think usually my clients are a little surprised that I go there because it’s like, “Well, that’s not telling me what to wear. That’s not telling me what not to wear. Why is it important that we take the step?” Well, the why is actually the energy that’s going to help you to stay motivated.
It’s the energy that’s going to make you realize that actually style is important, it’s not superficial. There’s a bigger reason why you want to look good, and it’s not about the clothes. It’s not about what other people think. It’s about where you’re going, what’s your calling, what’s your purpose? And stepping into that.
And it’s going to require a lot of energy and a lot of tough skin because there’s going to be obstacles, challenges. You’re going to order the clothes and it’s not going to fit; you’re going to have to return them. And that one was for you, Kim. And then you remember your why. Why am I doing this in the first place?
And so really, in my closet edit freebie I walk you through a very powerful seven step why process that really gets you to embody it and make an imprint on you so that you can remember that in your body and say, “Oh yes, okay, this is why I’m doing this.” And then you keep on, stay the course.
Kim: You got to keep coming back to it, you got to keep reminding your mind. Because it’s so easy to fall back into the trap of settling. Like having something that I love, that fits these needs, that I feel confident in, that I feel comfortable in, it takes the dread out of the having to go to do something or wanting to go do something. Because it was the top dread, it was the top objection or obstacle in my way.
No matter where we were talking about going, or doing, traveling, whatever it was, every time it came to what to wear, what to put on. I was like, “Well, what is everyone dressing like? What does it mean? Can we go in jean? What do we have to have?” That was always in my dialog. And so just removing that, it’s like I have so much more space in my mind. And I don’t have dread about events coming up.
Danielle: Yeah, and that is freedom. And it’s freedom also knowing that I do have stuff in my closet to wear. You’ve gotten rid of the stuff that you don’t love. So everything in my closet I love.
Kim: My eight-year-old granddaughter said, “Grammy is that all the clothes you have?” Because now you can see all my clothes.
Danielle: You can see the clothes. You know where they are.
You know you love them. You know they look good together. Now you just get to think about the trip.
Danielle: And how much fun that’s going to be.
Kim: That’s another thing, I had so much of everything that I couldn’t find anything.
Danielle: It’s just too much. It’s too much. And that’s the problem that most people have. So most women, especially, they only wear 20% of the clothes that they own. And that 20% a lot of times you can’t even find it because you’re looking through the other 80%.
And how much frustration, you just pull the clothes out the of closet, it ends up on the floor, you may or may not pick it up. You go on your trip, you come back, your closet is a wreck. You didn’t feel confident on the trip. Like that’s no more.
Now you’re going to gain clarity on what you don’t love and what you do love, you’re going to cultivate a closet to reflect that vision that you’ve created on purpose and intentionally. And you’ve taken action steps to purchase new items. That’s going to speak to that message that you’re creating and you’re projecting, again on purpose and intentional.
And then you have your why. So if you are ever in doubt, those limiting beliefs come back up, or there’s obstacles or challenges, you know, “Oh, I don’t have enough money, or there’s not enough time, or I’m not good at shopping.” No, actually, I know exactly what I love and what I don’t love. And I trust that if the item that I’m looking for is not there, there’s going to be something that’s actually better. And you’re going to start attracting all of that.
So I really think of it as fun. It’s like hunting to me. So like right now, I know one of my clients, she had to get rid of one of her favorite items, which was a pair of red jeans. And so now I’m attracting all of the red jeans into my vision. So anytime I’m on a website I’m like those red jeans are just like sticking out like a red thumb. They’re like, “Here I am. Here I am.” Where before a lot of women are like, “I can’t find anything to wear. There’s too many websites.”
Kim: It’s too much, yeah.
Danielle: Yeah, they just get clearer. And so once you have that clarity, it’s going to start to find you. You’re going to know exactly which items to purchase, whether it’s online or in person. And it can be fun. And yes, some women will never think shopping is fun. But it is doable and there’s no excuse not for you to look your best and look the part. The port that you are creating on purpose, co-creating with the universe.
Kim: And with your coach.
Danielle: And with your coach.
Kim: So we scheduled a day, we went and got pedicures, and like my intention was to come home with three new shirts. And we had lunch and I wanted to talk us out of it for sure, right? Because you need to get home to the kids. And it’s like, “Well, we can maybe do it later.” It was so easy to slip back into that habit of negotiating and not prioritizing it. And it was like, whoa, I just saw it again. Like this is a big deal.
Danielle: Right. It’s like what have you been avoiding? You’ve been avoiding doing this because it doesn’t feel good. Well, our thoughts are in control of our feelings, so what thoughts do I need to have in order to take the action steps?
Kim: It was like it was exposure therapy. Like we’re you do all the things that you say you don’t have time for, it’s too inconvenient, we’re not going to be able to find anything especially since all this COVID stuff now no one has anything in stock. All of those stories, that’s what kept coming up.
But we didn’t, we did it. And the result, guys, that clarity, make space for courage. To try something new, to do something against the stories that you’ve been telling yourself, to prove it wrong, to prove that your mind is just like spitting out thoughts that are not necessarily true. But because you’ve heard yourself say it for so long you think it is reality. It is not our reality, it is an illusion.
And the courage to the throw, to move, even if it’s to move it from room to room, which is how I started. I didn’t even have the capacity to throw because it brought up all the scarcity, all the fear. Like my nervous system was just like wreaking through my body. You remember I’d get like hot flashes and start sweating, and I was all red, and I was mad, and impatient. And it was like come back, we got to stay in this.
And the bottom line is, the result is confidence. Having that freedom from the chaos and the clutter, it’s like everything is so calm now.
Danielle: You walk into your closet, everything is spaced perfectly. You can see the colors. It’s almost like nature. It feels good right?
Kim: And the things I thought I couldn’t wear, that I am wearing, like the joggers. I was like, “Oh no, there’s no way.” I mean I was mad, I did not want to try that on. That is so stupid and I’m not going to wear that, and I hate them. And that stuff went on and now I had to go overboard and I have a few pair.
Danielle: Yeah, and she ended up loving the joggers, which that’s why it’s important to hire a coach that knows better. Because I knew that when she wore these joggers that she would love them and she would look amazing in them, and that she was able to wear them in multiple ways. And they hit all the categories that she was looking for. And quite honestly, I think every woman in the world needs a pair of joggers right now.
Kim: I didn’t, I was so defiant about it and so resistant. But I have them on right now. Super comfortable. You can dress them up, you can dress them down.
Danielle: There you go. The good thing is that you really trusted me. Even though you did throw a tantrum, you did it. You managed your mind.
Kim: I think it was easier once I was completely vulnerable and transparent, and said, “Listen, I want you to know that I’m really mad. And I know I’m having a temper tantrum. I need you to stay with me.” I realized I’m pretty strong about this, but my why was really strong. And for sure trusting you, I feel like I hand selected you. I hand trained you to handle me.
Danielle: You did, we can look back three years ago and before I knew I wanted to be a style coach, you were looking for a style coach, which was really crazy.
And then I had my own story where I went to the Acadiana Fashion Week and just fell in love with my passion from the past and started doing it for free. And now I’m getting paid to do what I love and it’s amazing. And it’s thanks to you and this coaching community and all the tools that I’ve learned.
So yes, but now I’m actually looking at my calendar and thinking that I’ll probably be able to do this full time in September.
Kim: So good.
Danielle: It’s so good.
Kim: So good. Is there anything you want to add for that person who is like, “Hell yeah, I’m ready to get started.” Because we’ve been talking to the resistance, but let’s talk to the person who’s like, this is the show she has been waiting to hear. This is the person she’s been waiting to meet. This is the program she’s been wanting to try.
Danielle: Yes, you have been waiting, you’ve been holding back, you’ve been knowing that you are ready to step out and shine and share all of your glory. But you’ve been waiting for permission to say that it’s okay to spend the money on you. It’s okay to spend the time and the effort. Yes, let’s go do it. Now’s the time. Here’s your invitation. You got it.
Kim: Oh yeah, they could be a projector waiting for the invitation.
Danielle: They could be waiting for the invitation.
Kim: Say, are you ready? Are you ready now?
Danielle: There’s no better time.
Kim: So we are going to link Danielle’s closet edit. It is a freebie, right? There’s no charge for it.
Danielle: Right, no charge for it. It’s a three-day closet edit challenge email series. So you’ll see me pop into your email. And yeah, you get to do it on your own time.
But I also have a Facebook group called Style Your Mind and Body With Danielle, and you can share your progress. So some of the other ladies that have taken it before, you can go and see their before and after closet edits. And just the freedom that they talk about that it gave them that they didn’t realize. Just getting rid of some clothes, how much lighter and more free they feel in their bodies, but also in their lives.
Kim: And this is also something we’re going to be doing in Self Healing Masters. So Danielle is going to be the expert helping along for those who are members in Self Healing Masters. The decluttering is going to be the theme coming up, and the closet happens to be part of that. We’re also going to declutter our mind, our cars, our pantry, our wherever the thing is that is creating the extra weight and heaviness in your life.
But I think that the clothes, specifically for women, for entrepreneurs, coaches, is so important that starting there, that alone might be the tackle for the whole entire challenge. Because it’s taken me months to really get to this point now. And I’m not done yet, which is why we’re doing the challenge right now because it is partially personal.
So I want to thank you for coming on, for sharing, for creating the challenge. I know it’s been great. We’ve got amazing feedback and benefits from people who’ve done it. And also for participating in Self Healing Masters and being a part of it.
So we’ll link your information, you said you have the Facebook group and the freebie. So we’ll just go to the freebie and that will take them to the Facebook group?
Danielle: Yes, so you’ll have an invitation to the Facebook group in one of the emails.
Kim: Perfect. All right, anything you want to add before we hop off?
Danielle: I just want to say thank you so much for creating this community, Self Healing Masters, and also for trusting me with one of your most personal spaces in your life, in your home, your closet. And I just want to welcome everyone to the closet edit challenge. That you’re going to be saying yes, doing it with us. And yeah, I just can’t wait to see all the before and afters, so excited.
Kim: All right, until next week.
Thanks for listening to this episode of More Than Mindset
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