Ep #91: Healers Triad

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Hey there and welcome back to the show. Guys, I have to tell you we have some gorgeous weather right now. The sun is beaming, got a local breeze. The moon has been glowing bright. We’re really enjoying not having bugs, there’s no mosquitoes right now, there’s no hurricane right now. It’s just this beautiful fall weather. So I want you to know I’m enjoying that. It was Halloween and homecoming and all kinds of crazy stuff this weekend. I saw that there were a lot of people out there being active and again today at the polls.

So it’s really weird watching the busyness begin to return. And yeah, I don’t really want to spend a whole lot of time on that. I feel like that’s what we’ve been talking about all year and none of us had figured any of it out. I don’t even think we’re ever going to know, yeah, what all of this entails. Let’s just do the best we can.

So today let’s talk about healing in general. Healing means to become more whole. To put you in a state where you are more able to accomplish what you wish to accomplish and maybe even be able to enjoy your life more. The wholeness involves healing maybe a physical wounding, maybe it’s emotional wounding. And very often we’re healing old habits and behaviors, and conflicts and relationships. It entails all of it. Healing is to make whole and new or more functional. It’s like I find that there’s this woo aspect to healing that I don’t think is appropriate.

When I speak about healing I am talking about coming back to your body’s natural state of wellness. Our body has the ability to heal itself mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually, in all aspects. Our body is really intelligent, it’s pretty amazing. When you think about it, just how it holds or maintains a normal body temperature no matter what the weather is like outside, just things like that. How the body just acclimates back to wellness on its own, unless the root cause has been hammered over, and over, and over, and then the systems start to shut down as they are overused or abused.

So, self-healing refers to what we can do with the internal system to function better and to heal faster and more thorough. Self-healing involves our behavior, being wise, tuning in to the needs of our body, of our mind, of our spirit, of our soul, making wise choices with putting nourishing food in our body. Exercising, or moving the body the right way, the way that it loves to move, getting the right amount of sleep, drinking plenty of clean water.

Those are the things that we can do to self-heal is to support our body, to support the systems of the body, to support our nervous system, to get plenty of rest, to recover properly, to have less stress and more ease. To allow life and not spend so much time fighting, or resisting, or trying to make it different, but how can we be in a state of grace and ease as we are transitioning into this more healing state, or this well state of being?

So I want to introduce the healers triad, which are three aspects of self-healing. The first one is mental management, or you could say mindset. It’s the think, feel, do cycle. I think thoughts, those thoughts create feelings and then I am compelled to take action according to those feelings. When I feel like this, I do this. When I feel like that, I do that. So it’s recognizing that our thoughts create our feelings and then our feelings compel our actions. And whatever actions we take, creates the results that we are living in our life now, pretty simple.

So when we’re talking about mindset or mental management it’s our ability to manage our thoughts, to direct them in a way that we want to feel, or how we want to live. You see, I’m trying to choose my words carefully. So mental management is managing or maintaining clean thoughts that create feel good feelings in our body. And that compels us to take positive actions. And then that gives us the results that we desire. And so it’s an awareness of mindset. It’s an awareness of managing your thoughts.

First of all, it’s understanding that we are the ones in charge of that. We are the ones that tells our brain what to do in order to create results that we are living today. It’s unbelievable how I always thought in the past that things just happened and you need to just accept it. Yeah, it’s just shitty, just how it is, that’s just what life is all about, you suffer then you die. That really is how I used to think, it’s like that stuff just happens to me, until I realized that that was my inability to manage my mind.

And now I feel really empowered by this awareness of understanding that I get to choose those thoughts to work for me so that I can get what I desire more of in my life. So that is the first leg or pillar of the healers triad, is understanding that we get to manage and control our thoughts. And that those thoughts create feelings and then we take actions from those feelings.

The second leg or pillar is emotional stability, or emotional regulation. And that is our ability to stabilize the way we feel, to process emotions and then to integrate that experience in our body. And so I’ll talk a little bit about this. How do we stabilize? It would be through the awareness of, or the understanding that sensations, feelings and emotions are felt in my body.

So if I experience something that scares the mess out of me, I may feel anxiety or fear. I may feel it in my chest. I might feel it in my throat or maybe in the pit of my stomach. But I will have this sensation in my body when I experience something that freaks me out, or something that I’m worried about, or something that I’m uncomfortable with, I will feel sensations in my body.

And it’s recognizing that I have the ability to process these emotions so that I do not repress or suppress them. Because repressed and suppressed emotions will be triggered at a later time. It does seem a little inappropriate, why am I feeling like this right now? And it’s because those feelings buried alive never really die, they just kind of hide in the body until a better time or a different outcome. So, emotional stability is recognizing that feelings and sensations in my body can be felt.

And the best way to explain this to you guys, who are listening that it may be new to, is describe the feeling. I feel this in my chest. It’s all around my heart. It feels like this big block or boulder on my chest. I feel a lot of pressure. It feels like something’s sitting on my chest. And then I can feel it pulsating in my throat. It feels like this throbbing. And so you’re describing it. You’re labeling it. You can say it’s like fire hot, like the color red, if it were a color it would be red. And it’s wider than my chest. It’s square. It’s thick. You see, I’m just describing it.

And you would do this for 90 seconds where you’re just present with the sensation. This is how you process. And then the integration is that being able to allow it to pass through and then it becomes an integrated experience. So think of it this way, prior to processing and integrating, it’s this unfelt perception. And by that I mean it’s the inability to feel it or to process it so then we naturally repress or suppress the emotions.

So we want to do the opposite, we want to become emotionally stable or emotionally regulated. That’s the ability to regulate the way we feel, instead of reacting, we begin to respond. It’s okay to feel this, I am safe. And then we describe it, we allow it to process through, integrate and then it becomes an embodied experience. So that is how you gain emotional stability.

The third leg or the third pillar is spiritual embodiment. And by that I mean BEing, capital B.E. you would think instead of doing, it’s about BEing, the sacred soul essence that you are, becoming more of your unique identity. It’s like you as a soul human, not just this body suit, or this mask, or showing it the way other people expect you to. But it’s really tapping into a deeper aspect of yourself.

That is the spiritual embodiment, it’s having this experience connected to God, or consciousness, or Christ consciousness however you choose to call. Some people say the Holy Spirits or just divinity; it’s just this divine being that’s outside of us that’s so much bigger than our little minute minds. It’s this being of life itself; some people will say the universe.

I don’t have a particular word for that so I’m not going to put my opinion on it. Whatever you feel calls you in a spiritual way that makes you feel more connected, that makes you feel safe and wholesome. That makes you really look at life in an intriguing and mystical mysterious way of really tapping into this sacredness of being. That’s what I mean by spiritual embodiment.

So the three legs or the three pillars are mentally, your mindset, your ability to manage your thoughts. And then emotional stability or emotional regulation is the ability to manage feelings and emotions to process and integrate. And then spiritual embodiment is the sacred soul essence, this BEing that is so much deeper than the mask that we all wear, it’s this unique blueprint of who we truly are at the deepest core aspect of ourself.

And inside of the triangle is the physical body. So when we are mentally, emotionally and spiritually connected then we will materialize that wellness in a physical way. So it shows up in our physical body. It shows up in our finances. It shows up in our relationships, in our career, in our confidence, in our ability to reach our desires and to materialize the life that we want whether it’s more meaningful relationships or a more meaningful career, your purpose and passion. These things follow.

It’s like once you are mentally, emotionally, spiritually connected then you can materialize that wellness in the physical world. And everything else shows up as the results or the benefits of being deeply connected, of being well, of being whole. That is what I call healing or self-healing is our ability to regulate this within ourself, to be in control of the way we think, of the way we react or respond, our ability to connect with other humans in relationship.

How willing are we to open our hearts and to truly experience love and compassion without judgment and comparison? That’s a pretty tough call, especially once our heart has been broken, once we have been saddened, or once we lose trust in someone. It’s really hard to open our heart again and be willing to be vulnerable, and intimate, and safe kind of all at the same time.

So self-healing is when we heal the aspects of our child self, you could say like the inner wounds or the inner child, and these experiences where we kind of separated from ourself, so I call this like soul fragments. It’s we leave little pieces of ourself left behind where we felt unsafe, or unworthy, or left out, abandoned, rejected. And we didn’t know how to process those aspects, those parts of ourself. And so we’re doing a lot of that work as adults.

And that is really what Self Healing Masters is all about, it’s healing on the physical level is still going to require mending on the emotional level, because it starts from that separation. And once we can identify that and bring those parts of ourself back onboard, and allow it to integrate and embody. Embodiment is the key word here, so all of these aspects, embodied in the physical, in this physical body. So you imagine it being in the body, embodied, all aspects.

So it’s like if you had a piece of pie and you cut it in four pieces and you had four slices. That is fragmented, it’s like separated. We want to bring those pieces back together and then we want to fuse where it was separated. So bringing it back into wholeness, that is self-healing, we can do this ourself. We don’t need medication to do it. We need presence, because in presence we have the awareness.

We recognize when it’s limiting beliefs or just an old generational pattern, or society’s conditioning, or religious dogma, whatever those stories are that we believe, but they are not us. That is what we are healing, we’re healing the disbelief. We’re healing the limited beliefs. We’re healing the unworthiness. And we are bringing ourself back to wholeness.

So I’ll leave you with an exercise just to give you a taste or a touch of that. And it’s just like for a moment just close your eyes and begin to notice your breath. Use the breath to anchor in your body, draw it all the way down to your belly and soften, exhale and release. A few more breaths, just inhaling with the eyes closed, and just feeling the sensations in the body, just noticing, it is safe to be in my body.

It is safe to experience these emotions. It is safe to heal. I am safe. It is safe in my body. Life is happening for me. Life is happening through me. I fully trust life. I allow life to come through me. I recognize that all of these experiences are a gift for me. I am here in my body now, it is safe, it is calm, I trust. Take a couple more breaths with the eyes closed. And then begin to wiggle the fingers and toes. Take a deep inhale, stretch your arms overhead, exhale and sigh away.

I am open to receive healing in my life, in my body, in my mind, in my relationships. I am willing to receive healing in the story that I tell myself. I am capable of changing the inner dialog, just because I used to believe, it doesn’t mean it’s so. I have the power to change the story.

And that’s it. That’s what I’ve got for you this week, alright my friends, until next week. Come over to the More Than Mindset group if you want to have discussions around this. I’ll be doing some live calls in there and some coaching. I look forward to meeting you.

Thanks for listening to this episode of More than Mindset.