Ep #171: How to Eliminate Distractions

Welcome to More Than Mindset, the only podcast that bridges the gap between spirituality and success. Go beyond the mind with clarity and confidence Coach Kim Guillory, and learn how to integrate your passion to serve with your skills and experience to create a business you love. Let’s get started. 

Hey, and welcome back to the show. This week I am talking all about detours and distractions. Guys, this is a big deal. Let me tell you a little bit about what it looks like and how we’re going to turn it around. A detour and a distraction looks like impatience. It’s like when you’re asking the question of why isn’t this working? And then you keep trying something else, rather than following all the way through.

So I see this with my clients, especially in business. But it also happens in relationships, in weight loss. Like you’ll be able to recognize that or I guarantee you’re going to be able to identify this, how it happens in all areas of life. But whenever we make a decision of what we want, right, so we choose. We choose the vision or the idea that we want to execute, the thing that we want to create. And then we create an action plan, and we start taking steps towards that action plan.

And then the mind will begin doing its thing. And that looks like questioning, why isn’t this working? Why aren’t people coming? Why isn’t he changing? Why isn’t the weight coming off fast enough? Those are tactics of the mind. And let me tell you a little bit about the mind, the mind is like a projector. It will continue to feed you information that you have fed it. So this is crazy how we allow the mind, the tactics of the mind, the thoughts to control us and to take us off course.

So imagine we were going on a road trip and you knew exactly where you were going, you were going to Sedona, Arizona, right? So you get your GPS, you set it, you know exactly what you’re going to be doing there, you know where you’re going to be staying, you have it all planned out. That’s the vision or the idea. That’s the thing that you are creating, the road trip.

You get in your car and then you’re driving and the GPS is like, straight 68 miles. And suddenly you begin to wonder if it’s correct, if you’ve done something wrong, that maybe that doesn’t look familiar. Maybe you need to turn around and go the other way. Maybe there’s a shortcut somewhere else. Maybe someone else went there and they went this other way, right?

Those are things that will start tempting you, tempting you with distraction. Because if you see that the GPS has already planned out the route 68 miles straight before you take the next right turn, right? That’s the course. And it’s all to get to the target. It’s very specific.

But then you start to doubt yourself. You start to second guess. You start to wonder and almost immediately ideas of who else did it? What other way can it be? Could they do it faster, right? Things like that happen. And this happens in your weight loss journey, it happens in your business, it happens in your relationships. We start looking at other people, we judge and compare.

These distractions, these detours are actually taking us off route and taking us further away from getting to the goal sooner. So it’s very much coming from an internal dialogue of questioning, of doubt, of disbelief, of uncertainty.

Now, that’s the story that most of us are living in, would you agree? It’s very tempting to pull over, to take that exit. And then what happens when you take the exit? You go ride around and you see a bunch of other things, you’re totally in the distraction. This is the mind creating drama.

And remember, the mind is just, it’s like a projector. We feed it the information and then it becomes a feedback loop. And all of the things that we believe about ourself or that we were told about ourself starts coming up and we start playing this recording. Which therefore takes us even further. I hope this is making sense.

So if you’re in business and you have decided I want to serve, I love helping people. I don’t want to keep doubting myself, I don’t want to live in this impostor syndrome. I hate feeling uncertain, and doubtful, and confused, right?

These are the things that we tell ourselves. I want to feel clear, I want to feel confident, and I want to have a clearly defined plan that’s going to take me closer to serving more people so that I can make more money. So that I can create more impact, right? Because that’s the theme. That’s how it works, you have to have all three.

If you want to help people you need money, you have to have resources, you have to be able to help yourself first. And the way to make impact is to reach more people. So these resources offer you opportunities to reach more people. So you have that clearly defined plan, you know exactly what you want to do. You have decided or determined your route of how you’re going to do that.

Maybe it’s a membership, maybe one on one coaching, maybe it’s group, whatever that looks like to you. And then what happens is you see something on Instagram, or on Facebook, or on YouTube, and you begin to doubt yourself. And I promise you, it is a reflection of all of the doubts that you have experienced in the past that are bubbling up to the surface.

And I want you to know this is completely normal. You have a human brain and you have a mind that loves to tell stories. It loves to be certain, it wants to know. But there is no such thing as this certainty and knowing because building a business, transforming your life, changing your relationships, recreating yourself is a journey. We don’t know what is going to be the thing that is going to create this explosive result.

And I guarantee you can talk to anyone who has been in business for 20 plus years and they’re going to tell you the same exact thing. There was not one certain thing that one person did that they followed that did it for them. It doesn’t work that way. Life is an experiment, we’re figuring it out as we go. But the mind is playing games. And your job, once you have this information, once you know this your job is to stay in your grounded knowing.

Keep coming back to the vision. Keep coming back to the plan, to the commitment. Keep moving forward according to that plan. And notice when the temptation to take the detour comes up, notice the distractions. Notice what the mind says on repeat. This is not you, so let you to learn how to interrupt that pattern.

I see this for the last I would say six, eight years in coaching coaches. When doubt sets in, when disbelief shows up, they begin looking at other containers, other coaches, other programs, other things because they believe the doubt and the disbelief is true. They don’t see that it’s just tactics of the mind. And they go off course, they take a detour, they go into the distractions.

Now granted, they might find something else. There might be new information there that they didn’t hear the first time. That happens, but what I have seen and notice to be most effective is to stay the course and deal with what comes up as you continue moving forward, instead of going down a different path, taking a different route, detouring.

It’s different in the way that you’re allowing the things to come up. Like the disbelief, and the doubt, and the worry, and the concern, and all of the thoughts about I’m doing it wrong, this is not working. And that is the actual part of the process.

If you could stay through that, the urge to change, the urge to quit, the urge to try something else. If you can maintain stability and commitment and keep moving through those distractions, through those detours, through those doubts, if you can keep moving I promise you the path will open up for you.

There is not one that is better than the other. But the one that you to stay consistent with is the one that’s going to take you there fastest. So it would be as if you were trying Weight Watchers, and then you tried Jenny Craig, and then you tried keto, and then you try the carbohydrate addict diet, right? It’s like you just keep trying, and trying, and trying.

And so each time your body has to adjust. Your system has to acclimate to the new. And so there’s a shifting period, and sometimes you will have this huge drop in weight, right? Sometimes you’ll end up stalling for even longer, that’s what I’m talking about. But if you stick to one thing and you solve the problems that present themselves on the way, like if you’re in a plateau you don’t change the diet, you actually shift through the plateau and you keep going.

So if your GPS is set for Sedona, you don’t change the route, you keep going through the route and you deal with what you come across on the way at that time. You don’t go and create the problem, you don’t go and create the roadblock. You actually go until there is a roadblock.

And who you will become in that process is what is going to take you to the endgame. That is the stability and the certainty that you’re looking for. It’s coming from inside of you. But if you keep taking detours, if you keep stopping in the drama, if you keep changing your mind and thinking the grass is greener somewhere else, somebody has a secret ingredient, or that there’s this one process that’s going to take you there faster, that’s actually the thing that will more than likely slow you down.

So this particular episode is for you who are being impatient, who are consistently stopping and trying something else, that continue to entertain the thoughts that something is going wrong. Here’s why it’s so important, your mind can only think of one thing at a time. And so if you have conflicting beliefs, it’s going to choose the one that is the most common, the one that you’ve gone to the most because that one’s the easiest.

It’s the easiest to believe, it doesn’t take as much energy. This is why negativity is so hard to break, because we are naturally negative just because the environment that we’ve been brought up in. And so you’ve got to catch on to these things and notice that the mind is playing games.

And this is mindset, this is what we’re talking about with mindset. So it is more than mindset because you do have to have strategy, you have that commitment. And you have to be willing to work through the nervous system response when these doubts, when the fear, when the temptations come up. When the impatience starts to create urges, urges to jump ship, urges to checkout, urges to go somewhere else. That thing is very much like a craving to eat ice cream, or chips, or Oreos.

So I’m just trying to give you different ways to look at it so you’ll understand where I’m coming from. The end game, the end result is the very first thing you’re going to choose. I want something different, I want to create this new way of living, or I want to create this business, I want to, it could be change your career, whatever. But you first start with an idea, then you come up with an action plan.

Like how am I going to get this? How am I going to do this? How am I going to improve my ability to make money, right? Or how am I going to get more clients? Or how am I going to start this business? You write those action steps down. You just need like three and you’re just going to take the first one.

And then when you get to a problem, you will solve the problem. Don’t get off the route, solve the problem on the route. Don’t change your mind. Don’t change the idea. Guys, this is the hard part. And listen, I am speaking from personal experience, not just what I see with my clients, but what I have done and still am tempted to do myself.

So stay the course, deal with the issue when it comes up. Notice the stories that the mind is telling you, how it’s so much easier over there, they’ve got something figured out that I don’t, I’m going to be able to do it faster, or look at what so and so did, all of that stuff. Just go all in and delete all the others. Just pick one and go all the way with it.

It’s like picking that one person to be married to, or picking that one, niche or that one goal weight with that one particular diet. You got to try this at least 90 days, okay? Just promise me that. So, come up with the idea, you come up with the action steps. And then whenever you hit the roadblocks or the objections, whatever comes up along the way, the distractions, do not take the detour.

You will be tempted to take the detour, don’t take the detour, okay? Don’t change the GPS, just trust. Just you trusting is going to empower you. And it’s going to teach you how to trust yourself because I promise you, once you commit to yourself, and to that thing, and you commit to taking the action, I guarantee you creativity follows.

Just like when you buy that car, and you think, “Oh my God, I never thought I’d pay $60,000 for a car, and now I’m committed and now I have a note for six years, and now I have to pay it.” Right? You commit, you don’t go trade in the car, right? Do you understand what I’m saying?

And so think of it that way whenever you’re changing your mind in whatever you’ve decided is the path, that you’re going to lose time, you’re going to lose momentum, you’re going to get caught up in the distractions and the drama.

So that’s what I have for you this week, is being patient. Recognize when the mind says this takes too long, I’ve been at this forever, I see everyone else is succeeding. You’ll be surprised how many people are not succeeding and they’re just showing up on social media as if they are. I promise you, I see this a lot.

So recognize that it’s the mind and the mind is just repeating. It’s like a mirror, right? It’s like a loop, this loop that’s on repeat of the environment you grew up in, the things that you’ve always told yourself, the doubts and disbeliefs. It’s just a go-to mechanism, man, you got to just be able to see it, let it play out as you stay on course and keep moving forward. Let me know how it goes.

Come to the More Than Mindset group, we have all sorts of free classes that have been going on about how to grow your business. I mean, they’re live, you can give feedback on any of these podcast episodes and ask questions. Were very personable. There are integrative coaches in there that can help you as well.

And if you are ready to grow your business, you’re ready to commit to yourself, when you’re ready to commit to whatever it is you said you were going to do, those that you want to serve, the money that you want to make, then I invite you to come to E-School. It is the best business school. I promise you, it is amazing. We take care of everything with you. We empower you, we don’t do it for you, we do it with you.

We don’t give you PDFs and links to go do it yourself. We actually get on a call with you, you get one on one with myself, with my tech gal, with my branding gal, Emily and Mallory. They’re as personable as I am. And so you have all three of us supporting you in your business and helping you niche down, create your offer, build out your library so clients can get to know you.

We brand you, we make sure that you’re branded across all social media. And we have experts from every platform that come in every month, and teach you about each platform as you’re finding the ones that’s going to work for you.

Today we had a branding class with Emily. So we are teaching you how to do it yourself. It is not just a program. It’s not just coaching. It is an actual school for business owners. So we’re teaching you how to become an entrepreneur. Because this was not taught in school, this is not natural, it’s not a natural skill set like learning how to sell, how to present yourself, how to market, how to message.

And so I want to personally invite you to come over to E-School. We guarantee to have you branded and out the door in 30 days. There’s a guarantee, I promise you we do, we set it up in a way that you get that one on one with us, with me specifically, to help you get really clear on your message so that you know exactly who you serve, what their problem is, who you are in the industry. We create that unique positioning.

And then we market brand new into this beautiful package. And then help you build your audience. And it’s amazing.

All right, until next week, have a good one.

Thanks for listening to this episode of More Than Mindset.