Ep #152: Human Design Emotional Authority

Welcome to More Than Mindset, the only podcast that bridges the gap between spirituality and success. Go beyond the mind with clarity and confidence Coach Kim Guillory, and learn how to integrate your passion to serve with your skills and experience to create a business you love. Let’s get started.

Well hello and welcome back. Guys, it has been a trip up in my world. So I’m going to tell you a little bit about it in a story. So these past couple of weeks I took off for the holidays, yay me. For the first time I did not work which gave me so much extra time to really love on my clients and think about what could inspire, and motivate, and liven all of us after taking this break.

That’s really what I was focused on, is enjoying not having a schedule and just kind of indulging in all of the things that I know they will bring into the world this year. Because they are bad-assess. I tell you, they are truly bad-asses. And I just spent a lot of time just loving on them, and daydreaming, and just wanting to watch them expand. And I had the best time.

What else I did was accidentally, for those who know Human Design there really isn’t an accident, right? I had the opportunity to respond to something that I have been dreaming about for a while.

So a few years ago, if you’ve been listening to the podcast for a while, I went on a three-week solo trip where I traveled from Louisiana to Santa Fe, to Sedona, Lake Tahoe, up into Oregon, down the California coast into Wine Valley, through the desert and back. Which was a fabulous trip and I fell in love with solo road tripping.

I had just gotten a Yukon and it was the perfect size, everything was great except I discovered that I don’t really like to stop. At 10 o’clock at night I think I am Super Woman, that I can just drive all night long. And then about 1 o’clock I hit a brick wall. So that is what I have noticed.

Recently I went to Asheville, and then I went back to back to Serenbe, near Atlanta Georgia, and to Colorado Springs. And I did the same exact thing three times. Like in September, and again in October and November, and then again in December. So I was like, okay, it might be time to change things up a little bit.

So I was going with my friend to the spa, you know I love to go to the spa. And right there off of the interstate was a Mercedes Sprinter, it really caught my eye on the California road trip. I saw one for the first time and I started wondering like, what is that? Then I would see it again at a rest area, then I’d see it again at these stop points.

And then when my husband and I went to Yellowstone I saw these vans again. And I just kind of put it in the back of my head thinking maybe one day. And I really didn’t pursue it other than kind of looking around to see what it was. Thought it was impossible.

And then when I saw it last Wednesday, it just called me in. And my friend who was riding with me said, “Do you want to go look at it?” Well, hello sacral response. It was an uh-huh. And so we took the exit and we went onto the parking lot. And I got the keys, I sat in the driver’s seat, I cranked it and I swear to you it felt like mine.

It was so comfortable. I cranked it, I drove around the parking lot, I couldn’t believe how well it drove, it felt like driving my Yukon. So I had a few moments, I went and laid down in the back, I played around with the sofa and the bed and the floor plan. And we just kind of played around with it.

And then we got in the car and we went to the spa and we did manicures and pedicures and two-hour massages. And then we went to Half Shell and had a martini and oysters and all of the good things, just a perfect day.

Came back home, sent the video to my husband and just kind of let it go.  Went off to sleep, woke up the next day because I have the sacral response, right, but I’m emotional authority. So that’s really what I’m talking about on the show today is the significance of having defined and undefined solar plexus. In Human Design we call this emotional authority.

So I sleep on it, I wake up the next day and I asked my husband, did you see the video that I sent? What did you think about it? Do you want to go and see it? And then we just kind of asked these questions back and forth.

So he asked me, do you want to go today? Which gave me, again, the opportunity to respond. So we go and we look at it, he drives it and he gets under the hood and does all the guy stuff. And we take it down the road and, guys, I swear to you, it drives– This big old monster van that I was so afraid of drives like my car.

And so he steps away from it. He’s like, is that what you want? All right, what do you got to do? And since then I have been waiting through my wave. And so that is what this episode is about. What is the significance of waiting through the wave? What does it mean to have a sacral response yet have to wait on an emotional wave?

So this is important to everyone listening, whether you are emotionally defined or not, and I’m going to tell you why. Regardless, if you’re defined or not, you are affected. Because if you have the emotional solar plexus undefined, 50% of us have it defined, 50% have it undefined. So regardless, there will be someone in your world that is going to affect this.

So my husband is not emotionally defined, he’s pure sacral generator. I am emotional generator, which means there is this up and down that is constantly moving through me. So if you are emotionally defined and you don’t even have to know your Human Design, I’m going to give you a couple of hints and you will know if it is you.

When you go to a restaurant, do you want to look at everything on the menu and then walk around and look at what everyone is eating? That’s the classic sign for me. I want to see and smell, and then I ask the waiter what is your favorite? What does everyone come here for? What’s the best thing on the menu? You know, like what is your best seller?

It drives my husband bananas because he has sacral authority. He walks in, he picks, poof, done. Waits for his food, eats, ready to go home. Very decisive. He looks at the van, he decides which one he wants, that is done. In just a few minutes he’s out of there.

As an emotional authority, I don’t know, maybe I’ll want… Let me go and see. What else is in there? And then how is that cooked? It’s just like a lot of exploration instead of decision.

And this is what will happen if you try to rush the process, you will often make impulsive decisions. I have done this a handful of times, enough to where I have learned. And I’m going to tell you, this is the story I want to tell you on the show today.

I came home and decided to start looking online. I wanted to see my options. I found out that there was a different floor plan, one with a larger refrigerator, and a bedroom in the back rather than the sofa sleeper. And I found one in Virginia. Same year, basically the same unit, but it was an individual who was selling it.

And I thought that’s what I wanted. I should have known better because I decided in the moment. I found out about it, he sent me a message, called me on the phone, took me on a FaceTime review through it. We just kind of passed, went through everything. And then within a couple of ours I was so solid, so certain, so sure.

So for those of you who are emotional authority, close your eyes. And behind your left eyelid imprint not, and on the right eyelid now. There is no truth in the now for emotional authorities. So close your eyes and say not now. Because that impulsiveness comes from the high and from the excitement. And it feels really, really sure.

You feel very certain because the excitement is the driver. Okay, and because the emotional solar plexus is the center that is attached to our emotions, to our passion, to our feelings, and it is hugely important and also very susceptible to conditioning.

So understanding the wait on the wave is possibly the most important thing in your life that is going to affect your decisions, anything about moving forward in relationships, in business, in big decisions, in purchases, all of the things. So if you have the center defined, then you are an emotional being and this is your authority. So that means that it overrides the sacral yes or no now. Okay?

So I’m going to give you three ways to detect and to start practicing this, because you have to ride your wave before making the decision. Now coming back to the story, I sent a deposit to the guy in Virginia because I was so certain. And there was a couple of incentives that got me really excited. And I responded to those. Instead of waiting it out, I answered in the excitement.

And this is the scary part about it, is the highs are really, really high. And they’re really short lived. And that’s why there is such an opportunity for this impulsiveness. Because in the excitement, it’s kind of like the kids, I want a pony, I want a puppy, I want a… Right? It’s like you get so excited that you just have to have it.

And then after you make the decision, there is this low. It’s this kind of lull into a low. And the low is long. The high is short lived. Not long after I sent the deposit I went into a state of anxiety. And I started kind of freaking out about, man, there’s a hallway, there’s a bedroom, it feels like I bought a camper, it’s going to be closed in.

Whereas the first one was really wide open. The whole left side I could see out of the windows, it had four captain chairs and the sofa in the back. So it had two seating areas. It would be great for just traveling and really putting some miles in and then yet stopping to rest, which is exactly what I was looking for.

Just like when I started the show off and I said I was driving 13, to 16, to 17 hours. I wanted to pretty much drive through the night, I just needed to rest. So notice how that impulsiveness, that excitement kind of pulled me away from my desire. And then the little extra bargaining and the deal, and then the excitement about going to Virginia and driving it back for my first road trip. All of that stuff was in the mix of the high.

So when we notice in our day-to-day highs and lows, it will help you in making bigger decisions. Now, this turned out okay, but it could have been a pretty sour deal for me. I think that life was giving me that one more opportunity for me to really get this.

Because you know, when we’re at that point of transformation where we’re really beginning to get something, we’ll have that one more visit, that one more time, that devaluing yourself once again, right? It’s like, okay, I just needed to make sure I’d never do that again. It feels like that is what happened.

So, because our emotions paint our reality, we have to be really careful because we believe the excitement is the reality. We believe that’s how it is, like the pony and the puppy. Like it’s always going to be this way, it’s so fun, it’s so cute. And then the puppy pees, and it needs to be fed, and you got to take it to the vet, and it needs meds, all of the things.

You don’t even see that when you’re in the high because you’re blinded in the high, you’re blinded by the high. And so you have to give it enough time for that to drop down.

Now listen, you could be in the low and still be a yes. So in other words, I could have waited 24 to 48 hours to 72 hours. If it wasn’t meant to be it just wouldn’t have been there anymore. So that’s that impulsiveness. It keeps you safe when you follow. When you follow the strategy and authority, when you follow your perfect way of making decisions.

Now, my husband can decide in the moment on the spot. He did that. He came, he walked through it, he drove it. He looked at me, that’s what you want? Okay. In the moment he was done. Then I start taking him down this journey of this Virginia van.

So he’s like, wait a minute, I’m so confused. I didn’t go to Virginia and look at it. You’re asking me to say yes or no to something that I have no idea anything about. I went over here, I checked it, I feel good about it. So he was following his inner authority.

Can you see the difference? We’re kind of crazy as emotional people. Not really, but we get accused of being kind of moody, wishy-washy, changing our mind, don’t know what we want. So that’s what I mean, if you don’t know your Human Design but you have the tendency to do that, and you’ve done it since you were a child, you can be sure that you’re an emotional authority.

It’s like it pulls you in, into this is my reality right now. And so you have to really be aware of the wait so that it can settle down, so that the dust can kind of drop to the bottom. Because you’ll get caught in that. It creates this conflict and confusion. So it’s very important to understand this.

So for the rest of the story, I messaged the guy back. And I was like, would you send my deposit back? And by the way, I would be willing to drive your van from Virginia all the way to California to the other guy who wants it, that you don’t want to bring it to. I was serious.

And anyway, it kind of went on, had a couple of conversations, but I was very certain. He sent my money back immediately, so I’m saying it worked out well. And I am talking like I’ll probably go get the camper in the next couple of days. It has to go through the shop, and it has to get cleaned up, and all of this stuff.

So I’m assuming by the end of the week, by the time that this airs, that I will be the owner of a Mercedes Era 70X, that’s what I’m buying. And what I learned in the meantime was what was most valuable. And that is to truly honor that inner authority.

And if you are non-emotional, recognize that the person around you that’s going up and down and asking a lot of questions, and they’re taking their time to decide, and it’s driving you batshit crazy, to really step back and give them their time and honor their process.

So I’ll give you a little hint of what we have done. For one thing, we very rarely eat anywhere that’s not Mexican. The reason is he can drink a margarita and have some chips and salsa while I decide. Because he was very cranky when we would go somewhere and they take the orders together and I couldn’t decide. And I am going to wait before I am going to make a decision, I’m not sure about which was creating a lot of chaos for us.

So we make sure that we always go somewhere where he can be fed instantly or there some sort of quick appetizer or a drink, something to settle him down, because he knows right away. And we used to fight about this, now it’s kind of a little joke. And I’ve really come to embrace that wait within myself.

So one thing I might do is decide ahead of time, kind of create a desire for what I’m hungry for so that I’m sure whenever I get there. The other thing is just to have a few drinks and laugh about it. And walk around the restaurant and look at what everyone else is ordering.

And for those who listen to the podcast who have been with me personally, whether it’s out of town or in town, because I’ve met a lot of you in different places, you’ve seen me do this. I do it pretty much every single time. Especially if I’m in a new town and I’m at some sort of event and I’m just not sure. I will walk around, smell it, look at it, kind of pass back and sit.

And some people are embarrassed by that, I’m not. It’s just the way that I make decisions. And I have to feel things, I have to sense things. And otherwise, I’m unhappy, I’m disappointed because if I make an impulsive decision I am frustrated when I get it. And that shows me that I’m out of alignment because I didn’t do it the proper way.

Now I’m using food and stuff like that, but this, it’s a big purchase. I’m not just talking about ordering food. I’m talking about a home, a home on wheels. And what it taught me, I don’t think I will ever not honor someone taking their time.

And for those who are listening who deal with coaching and clients and sales conversions, I ask you to truly consider that 50% of the humans are emotional authority. Give them time instead of pushing the urgency and coming from the place of scarcity and you need to tell me now and if you don’t, you’re not going to get this. That is not healthy for us, it creates a lot of pressure.

Which leads me into the three things that you need to know if you’re an emotion authority. And three things you need to know if your partner, family, friend, is an emotional authority. One, this is coming from outside of you, so the cosmos are predicting this wave. Your environment is predicting this wave. And the reaction to your thoughts is predicting this wave.

So it’s coming from within you, it’s coming from within the environment, and it’s coming from the planets, what’s moving through at the time. So I think about the Schumann’s resonance and the energy of the planet. And how this is affecting all of us, whether we were defined or not.

Because if you’re not defined, it’s kind of like having a screened in porch. So you’re being affected by the temperature, by the sounds in the neighborhood, they’re coming in through the screens. You’re getting a taste of this energy outside of you, it’s coming in and out of you. And so you will feel it, and you will often think it is you. But it is not, it is a wave. It is a very powerful wave. And all of our waves are unique to us.

So I work with quite a few emotional authorities. In Self-Healing Masters we break down charts, we have these conversations, and we do it in real time. So we’re always sharing experiences and relatability so that we can better relate to people at home.

Because if we are in a container, speaking this language, and we’re getting a taste of defined centers, and undefined centers, and certain characteristics or energies of the charts, and dynamics, and how that affects us, then we have a better understanding of how that affects our loved ones.

So we do this in a very simple way. I don’t use Human Design as another way of conditioning you. It’s not like, hey, your chart says this, so you have to do this. That is not how I look at it. I look at it as potential. This is mechanical, there is a potential that you will maybe feel this fear, or feel this inconsistency, or feel this wave, there’s a potential.

And so if we can bring it to your awareness and you can understand that it may not be you, that it may be something outside of you or something that is moving through you, then you can pivot. Then you can navigate so that you can have better relationships, better health. You can contribute to the world in a way that feels good to you. You can express in a way that feels good to you. You can be satisfied and successful.

So I feel like that might have been a whole lot of information. I hope it was helpful. I wanted to share the experience, mostly of that impulsive decision that I made in a matter of a couple of hours that I sent the deposit.

After driving this other one two times, I went two separate days. And I was feeling out my wave and I had this impulse reaction and put the down payment on the other one. And then ended up getting out of it. I recognized it, I was very honest and transparent, which is also in my design. And it worked out and so I’m back on path, I’m still waiting.

So for those of you who are kind of wondering how long the wave will last, it’s pretty long once you really start working with it. Imagine, I think it was 2017 or 2018 is when I went on the California trip. And that is when I first saw it and had the idea. Like I planted the idea of I really want this because I will be able to have the restroom, and I will have the bed whenever I need it. I will be able to stop and rest and put lots of miles and go very far.

And that van showed up in my area like down the road from my house now, in the middle of a lot where it does not belong, there’s no other one of its sorts. It’s so weird. And it was just sitting there waiting for me. And I drove it for the first time almost a week ago, tomorrow will be a week. And it is still there and we’re still in the process.

And there has been no pressure, they have not pressured me at all. Matter of fact, they closed at four o’clock one day I was there and they didn’t even give me the price because they were closing. And then the next day was New Year’s Eve and they were closing at noon. So they called me with the price like at 10:30 and then they were closed so I couldn’t get back in touch with them. And then they were opened again on Monday, today is Tuesday.

So just to say if you honor your strategy and authority, if you honor the emotional wave, life is working for you. Source is working for you, God is on your side. You are protected, you are supported, you are cared for. It will all work out if it’s meant to be.

And so I invite you to play around with the emotional wave. Whether your defined or not defined, whether it’s your partner that has to wait through it, or if it’s you or your children. Just explore. Come into the More Than Mindset group, let me know if you’re finding anything out, how it’s going for you. And better than that, come into Self-Healing Masters where we will pull the chart and we will start practicing the experiment for yourself.

This is a long process. I have been at this since I’m 48 years old and I am still learning so much. But I’m enjoying teaching it and really watching relationships improve and soar. And watching people heal their lives from the conditioning from years of generational patterning, and societal conditioning, and religious dogma, and environmental messaging.

All of the things that you’ve heard as children, as young adults. And what your family and your living arrangements have conditioned you as. Being able to release all of that conditioning and truly come to get to know yourself.

I call it this call to wholeness, where you can release what is not you and you can become what is you so that you can be that individual spect that is so important to the world for all of us, that we were all our individual selves. All right, my friends, until next week.

Thanks for listening to this episode of More Than Mindset.